The tech industry — and the world — is made up of individual humans, and a lot of those humans are suffering. Each of us has the opportunity to do something about it. I was able to change, and I truly believe that anyone can.
If you’re surrounded by jerk programmers, please know that they’re likely just insecure (and possibly also lonely and scared and sad) like I was. Try to avoid them while also feeling compassion for them.
Eventually, I realized that taking time to care about other people’s emotions isn’t just kind — it’s actually more efficient if it leads to smoother interactions that don’t trigger people’s threat responses.