How listening makes you clever:

Oliver Wendell Holmes wrote, “To be able to listen to others in a sympathetic and understanding manner is perhaps the most effective mechanism in the world for getting along with people and tying upb their friendship for good.”

Sometimes there are situations where it is important that we do not show our hand prematurely, where we need to feel out positions of others. The best strategy is to first find out what the others know; what they will settle for before showing your hand. Just as we can determine another’s position by listening to them, too much talk on our part gives position away.

Successful people encourage others to talk - and to keep on talking - while keeping their own mouths shut. If you can get othera talking ENOUGH, they cannot DISGUISE real feelings or motives. They may try, but they invariably will give themselves away.

So, if you don’t want others to know what’s really on your mind, keep your mouth shut and listen. Others will find you out if you just keep talking long enough.

Practice the art of listening:

1. Look at the person who is taking.

People worth listening to are worth looking at. And it will also help you concentrate on what they are saying.

2. Appear deeply interested.

If you agree, nod you head. If they tell a story, smile. Respond to cues.

3. Lean towards the person.

Ever notice how you tend to lean towards an interning speaker and away from a dull one?

4. Ask questions.

This lets people know that you are still listening.

5. Don’t interrupt; instead, ask for more.

People are highly complimented If you allow them to finish without interruption. But, they are really flattered when you draw them out with : “would you mind elaborating on the last point?”

6. Stick to speaker’s subject .

Don’t change subjects no matter how anxious you are to get on to a certain topic.

7. Use the speaker’s word to get your point across.

Repeat some of the points covered. This not only proves that you have been listening, but allows you to introduce your own ideas without opposition. Preface you own remarks with : “As you pointed out…”