What does it mean to lead with your heart?
What does it mean to lead with your heart? Does it mean to lead with feeling? Somatically I’ve come to understand that we feel things in different places in our body. I feel anger in my biceps, and in the tips of my fingers. I feel panic in the top of my lungs. I feel fear in the tight flank muscles along my ribcage. I feel the burden of a deadline in the fire hot volcano knots at the inside corners of my shoulder blades.
What, actually, do I feel in my heart?
I’ve felt the piercing pain of heartbreak, distinctly in my heart. In moments where I wasn’t quite sure if my heart would give out under the burden of the cracks that I could feel forming. Splintering the muscle into shattered pieces. Broken-heart syndrome is an actual medical condition. Of course it is. Thankfully science is coming to terms with emotionality as a physical function of the body. In the body.
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I know that our ability to recall pain is an evolutionary survival mechanism, designed to help us identify and avoid possible threats. Pain recall lives in our nervous system as a type of protector. Standing guard, like the steady marching guards at The Tomb of The Unknown Soldier. Pacing on, waiting for a queue, a trigger, so they can address the malfeasance. Perform their duty.
But in this moment, as I’m trying to recall a positive feeling centered in my heart, a heart-felt sentiment, I find that when I look, my recall mechanism shows me instead a memory of pain. Like a projector that’s stuck on the wrong channel.
If there is one thing I’ve learned from the past sixteen years of studying spiritual and emotional development, it is that my instinct to fight against this natural biological response, to rail against it’s injustice, will only lead to more suffering. Anything I resist will amplify. And so, I’m left with only one path: Curiosity.
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What is the meaning of this pain? How can it be used to serve a Higher good? Which, I do believe, that all natural instincts exist indeed, to serve a Higher purpose. As I believe that all of life is designed to rush in and support the expansion of more life.
The opportunity for usefulness might lie in the function of any polarity. A positive charge and a negative charge serving to create a flow of energy that has a much Higher meaning and purpose than the sum of its parts.
Heartbreak would not exist if love weren’t there at the start. If love and pain are polarities in the same energetic field of the heart, what does it mean to honor both sides and lead wholly integrated- from the heart?
To encompass all of life’s highs and lows. To embrace the ebb and flow of our dreams and plans. To always remain steadfast in the present moment, knowing and accepting with complete surrender that any moment could be alive in an ebb or a flow, and that no matter what the state of the day is, it is subject to change. And at the end of the day, that knowing, the understanding that a new tide will come in, and yet, go back out again, is faith.
So possibly, to lead from the heart doesn’t mean to lead with love, but, to lead with faith.
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