Talking about yourself, a journey
You have reached the beginnings of my blog, a place for me to place a penny of my thoughts on various life matters.
So here it goes, welcome to the blog of solarblue!
I wanted this to be my first post because I view talking about oneself, presenting, negotiating and standing your ground while not being self-centered or vain as a means to propel forward in life, to reach for your dreams because you always deserve everything you work on and aspire to do.
Keeping a balance between not doubting your worth and not having an inflated view of self.
Speaking your mind without shoving it on others.
Setting boundaries while knowing yours.
To this day I don’t acknowledge self-presentation as a trait we’re born with — it deals with knowing thyself (Greek: γνῶθι σεαυτόν), self-love and confidence. Those are everyday lessons to learn and practice.
So how do I fare on this matter?
Neither did it come fast or easy in my experience, not by chance or suddenly. Talking about myself is an active 10 year long chapter in my life and has followed me from childhood to college life and now entering the workplace.
Starting off, it was clearly easier to not to share my hobbies, my interests and aspirations to the greater public (of school). Everything worked like a clock, free time was abundant and no one to object or review my goals, no biggy.
Then college happened, a new challenge on my field of preference and my time to shine! The most shocking difference it made in my life? Looking at a sea of opinions, ever changing and making me question the value of my work, interests and opinion.
A shining example is that I’d get a mini panic attack on presenting my ideas or being asked a question upfront on them, so I preferred to lay low and not reach for the front line — just good is enough, as long as it doesn’t attract attention.
Until I reached the point of realisation, “I don’t want to be like this, can’t even stand my ground and receive acknowledgement…”
So I started challenging myself! I got into all sorts of opportunities, presentations, projects. I met lots of new people, went to conferences I barely knew what they were about, talked to as many strangers as was still not too creepy, pursued whatever frightened me.
As I was getting a bit more social and confident, Finland happened. Meeting tons of people from all around the world and a new foreign (to the mediterranean) culture, studying on my degree along with various interesting off-curriculum classes like PM and LinkedIn 101, changing 2 thesis subjects and making one there (blog post coming up on that), seeing reindeer, petting them, sauna, cottages, snow and punctual, organised public services…it was quite a ride.
So I came back, in shock. I felt both fearless and helpless as I could not function in the Greek reality. But I realised one thing, I aim to be part of the world as it is part of me, communicating, learning and sharing experiences. That is how we grow, in community.
Then I realised it was never about the others, it’s is about me — who do I want to be?
Almost 2 years, many events and challenges of my comfort zone later I can’t say I’m the best at what I do, and that’s okay. Being myself is all that’s needed of the world, nothing else is missing.
Being grateful for all the people that stand beside me as we set off to new projects, events and life experiences is also eye opening. We’re not everyone’s cup of tea and this is why I appreciate those that are even more in my jou.
I still get this uneasy feeling every time I’m about to present or make a choice, but then I remember it is simply an interview where you’re always the right person for the job — because no one can be better at being you, than yourself. ❤
After all, writing my opinion and story publicly scares me lifeless — and that’s exactly why I’m excited about this blog!
どうぞ よろしくおねがいします。
Douzo yoroshiku onegai shimasu.
(Japanese: Pleased to meet you. / Usually used at the end of a self-introduction.)
~Anastasia
solarblue.me/
