On Pain, Failure, Stutters and Perspective

I watched “The King’s Speech” again last weekend.

It’s possibly one of my favorite and most painful movies to watch because I resonate so strongly with the lead character, King George VI (played by Colin Firth).

Why?

I used to stutter worse than that.

You see every single pain, frustration and anger he feels as he struggles to get the words out? I felt it. I know it. Every single one of those experiences is embedded deep in my nightmares.

Growing up, it would take extreme effort for me to get words out, let alone speak full sentences. I remember I’d only be able to get out one or two phrases in a minute or two. Sometimes, words would not come out until I banged on a table or hit a wall. Fellow kids would walk away while I was still trying to speak.

My stutter shaped my early life in many ways; it made me deeply insecure, incredibly introverted and it was generally much harder to make friends. People called me shy, arrogant or proud because I kept to myself, my books and the gadgets I’d build. What they never knew was that I literally didn’t have much to say.

But it also shaped my entire life. The incredible thing about being deeply introverted and not being able to speak much, is that you learn to say less and listen…