when not being ok is ok…

I don’t know but today seemed kinda odd. No, I’m not Ice cube but I do share the same sentiments. In all honesty though ever since I got back from London things have been viewed totally differnt. It is like prespective has been gained. Important things are less important than what I thought. Wisdom has been gained. Through words, experiences, drug trips. I kinda put my foot on the gas of life and it seems like indeed I do have heavy foot. Friends aren’t really friends like I thought. Damn folks wanna use me for my paper. Damn really wanna use me for my time. Damn folks wanna use me for my food, drink, car whatever the case may be. My giving nature is much attributed to this. People are gonna take what you give them and I was giving to the masses. Big Dog said I gotta save it for the right ones. Everyday now, the wrong ones are showing their true colors. Ive been more keen to things I was oblivoius before. Life is becoming more of a mental struggle nowadays than anything else. Trying to maintain stability. I wanted to face the journey alone but you get what you ask for tenfold. For the first time I feel like I don’t have any true lean on dependable freinds. I have tons of people I’m cool with but its just me in it. Exaclty how i want it. So this is the fight it’s either a win or lose but I feel like I’m ready. July 7th new beginings.

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