Where are you from…what do you do…who are you?
When people meet me for the first time, they ask me, “where are you from”? I reply with the name of the city location that I am currently residing in and then they probe me more as though they are not satisfied with my response and ask me, “where are you really from”? I try not be surprised with this line of questioning and reply “I am from India, particularly the southern part — Hyderabad”. This seems to satisfy the inquirer, which is then followed by “ What do you do? , you must be an engineer and must have studied something technical?”
I smile, not in mirth, but more so with the realization that the inquirer felt a relief in placing me and in categorising me based on my ethnicity. I say, “Yes, you are right, my formal education has been technical so far and yes I have worked in technical field settings and continue to do so”.
Like everyone else, who are of the notion that if you work hard today your story will be different in your yawning future as compared to your past, my reasons for getting here are similar in some ways and in some, different. It took extraordinary amount of enduring strength, persisting passion, continuing courage to keep going although I have fallen, fallen more than I was standing up. I take pride in what I learnt, I am grateful for what I am able to do and I honor who I am now. But there’s more.
There are times you realise you want to guide your self narrative to flow in between the times when a narrative is being projected onto you and the times when there is no narrative at all. This is that time.
Who we are and thereby what we choose to do with our lives is linked with our self identity which is nurtured primarily through our original culture. Although there may be cases where this original culture purposed identity can overlap with that of self identity, it is dangerous to assume the culture purposed identity as our only identity. When this conditioning is infused with culture assimilation without compromising authenticity, there comes a chance to venture out onto the vast plains of possibilities. Research shows that assimilation and acculturation provide mediums for self expression and self realization. Assimilation allows for the breaking away of cultural stereotypes and forges the path to establish the true self.
Communities can be that channel through which the processes of assimilation can seep through gently or gush through with intensity. Communities are a reflection of every member’s unique dreams, hopes, wishes and life’s mission projected on the center stage representing shared beliefs and values of a people, of a collective. Communities allow for the creation and preservation of an integrative environment that bridges individual identities and organises a collective identity. On this bridge lies an opportunity to conceive of self empowerment, community development and social change.
To embrace our full selves, we must be proud of who we are in the now, of all the experiences that have made us into the person for the now, but also not be afraid to imagine, create and release a version of ourselves into the bottomless unknown, allowing these versions of ourselves to flow back and forth freely, to meld into each other, to morph into something more,
which is a hallmark of constructing newer, richer and more complex expressions of ourselves, without any restraints imposed by ourselves or by the world around us.
I am here, to stand in my identity and to shape it, for myself, for the communities around me and so on, knowing that I too can be a part of this infinite cycle of creation. So when you meet me don’t ask me where I am from, ask me where I am going, don’t ask me what I do, ask me how I do what I do, don’t ask me who I am, ask me why I am who I am.