Image by Sondra T. Primeaux

I was forty-five years old when I quit drinking alcohol. I’d slammed myself against the proverbial wall so many times, year after year, one decade going on three that I was finally growing tired. One random Sunday in the Summer of 2014, instead of getting up off the ground and going through the same set of motions that had never not ended with my face against the same said wall, I laid there for a beat and in that beat I decided to get up and walk in a different direction.

I called it my Mid-Life Solution.

There were some…


Photo by Sondra T. Primeaux

When he was a smaller boy, under two feet in length, I’d always say, “He would crawl back inside of my womb if he could.” The way he would jab his foot into my belly, his tiny hand always on my boob or Nummy, as he’d sweetly say, it was like he could have slipped back under my skin and burrowed back into my guts. The heat generated between us two was often more than I could take so I’d push him off, space is what I needed, air to breathe. …


Photo by Sondra T. Primeaux

“Can you tell me what is wrong with this photo?”

I could feel Clark’s eyes rolling around in his long-haired, weed-wafting head, even as he stood behind me in the dark. Come to think of it, I don’t think we ever locked eyes once. When I pursued the job in the best black and white photo lab in the city, I really had no idea what I had signed up for. I was a decent photographer at that point in my life, knew my way around a lab but it turns out, I was a terrible printer.

At least according…


Photo by Sondra T. Primeaux

I’ve only ever had one office job in my life. I was in my twenties and I worked there for exactly one year. Before that and after, I only worked restaurant and retail, the occasional stint in a darkroom or a few gigs as a photographer’s assistant. I used that year of office work as a good reason to pull out all of the great thrift I’d collected but never worn, like skirts with waistbands and zippers, secretary blouses with delicate bows at the necks, fifties lawn dresses with cinched waists and tights. I had every color of opaque hosiery…


photo by Sondra T. Primeaux

“You changed your cat’s name?”

I can’t remember if I ever asked that question out loud or if the incredulousness only existed in my head.

The cat, formerly known as Geddy, as in Geddy Lee, lead singer and bassist for the Canadian band Rush, was now named Slim, and as ironic as that name was, as this cat was far from slim, Bill changed his cat’s name fourteen years in. The cat, like Bill, didn’t appear to be experiencing the identity crisis that I was projecting and anyway, isn’t that what moving off to college is for? …


Photo by Sondra T. Primeaux

“Do you want to hang out after work?”

“Uh, YES.”

If I was consistent at anything, I was consistently impulsive. I mean, Steve was pretty by industry standards, and even by zero standards. And as one of the undeniably gorgeous, I inadvertently threw him into the Beautiful People category and didn’t think much of him beyond that. So an impulsive YES out of my mouth should have surprised even me, but that is what impulsive YESES are, right? They fly out of your mouth before the committee has a chance to weigh the options, play Devil’s Advocate, ponder a possible…


Photo by Sondra T. Primeaux

There was a dance everyone did in the clubs in 1988 and my friend Maeve had it down. You would sort of awkwardly tumble forward then hop, beat the imaginary bongos for a bit, spin and repeat. She really had a style and when the DJ would play The Promise, she would shine. She always seemed to come right out of a perfect 360 degree spin at, “I’m sorry, but I’m just thinking of the right words to say” and when she beat her arms, she would take it a step further and go really low like she was taking…


Photo by Sondra T. Primeaux

It was supposed to work. This trip was supposed to fix us. I do remember this. But the rest of that year? It’s like trying to remember the year I turned ten. I remember how I felt about turning double digits. I remember how I felt about flying down that hill on my bike, banana seat between my legs, going so fast that I didn’t have to hold the handlebars but only feel the streamers flutter in my face. I remember I felt strong and in control of that particular moment, Queen of the Banana Seats, joyfully reigning on that…


Photo by Sondra Primeaux

When the familiar warm sunshine hit my face, I wanted to enjoy it for a moment before opening my eyes. I waited for a kiss from my sweetheart in those seconds, breathing in the smells of my environment under the giant sky. The sweet, chirpy bird sounds drifted into my consciousness but were abruptly destroyed by screeching tires on pavement. My eyes snapped open wide. I looked down and attempted to focus after initially being rendered orb-blind to see my cute pink vintage purse, clasped and resting neatly on my body. I scanned my body, fully clothed in the outfit…


Photo by Sondra Primeaux

He was delicious right after a shower. Sitting cross-legged and naked on my beige carpet, I could have just eaten him whole. Instead, I brushed and braided his hair while he talked on the phone, inhaling all the sandalwood soapy smells that I knew would soon fade when he re-donned those damn hemp shorts. …

Sondra Primeaux

Wrangling words, assembling pixels, sewing fine fabrics. See it all at www.theunruffled.com

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