Orange Julius Caesar

Trump is freaking out this morning. He wants his Twitter followers to really think about how Russia sent millions to the Clinton Foundation and how the fake media isn’t following the Russian uranium deal with Clinton and Obama. “Workers of firm involved with the discredited and Fake Dossier take the 5th. Who paid for it, Russia, the FBI or the Dems (or all)?” Trump just put Russian dressing on a Caesar salad.

Caesar doesn’t have a Cleopatra because he’s old and gross and everybody hates him.

His name was Sergeant La David T. Johnson’s. His widow’s name is Myeshia Johnson. He never uses their names when talking about them because he doesn’t know their names and he doesn’t care. “He doesn’t even know his name,” Myeshia said after she hung up from talking to Trump on her way to receive her husband’s body at Miami International Airport. Trump couldn’t be there. He had to golf.

Congresswoman Frederica Wilson was in the car with Myeshia, as well as her mother in law. The phone was on speaker so they all heard the conversation and they all concur what Trump said. Trump denies it and calls them all liars. He has proof.

He has started a new war with Congresswoman Wilson. She needs to make a new statement because it didn’t happen. Sarah Huckabee Sanders said that she has politicized the issue. Sarah is appalled. Sarah’s God is appalled but she just rationalizes that away.

This has never happened before. No president has ever politicized the death of soldiers before. Nobody has ever politicized the military before.

The right wing media is going crazy, blaming the left for exploiting the Congresswoman’s lie and using dead soldiers to make Trump look bad. Fox News DEMANDS that Myeshia show gratitude for Trump’s call.

Benghazi conspiracy boobs are conspicuously quiet on Niger.

Hillary testified for 11 hours on Benghazi. Tillerson should be made to testify for at least 12 hours on Niger so he can prove his balls are still there. For now, we just have to take his word for it.

Jeff Sessions testified for 5 hours and perjured himself. In January he said he had not met with the Russians and now he says maybe he did.

Republican hypocrite fun fact: Senator Chuck Grassley says the American people have the right to know why Trump fired Comey. WE KNOW WHY! He told Lester Holt in a televised interview that he fired Comey over the “Russia thing.”

White Nationalist Richard Spencer is speaking at the University of Florida today. The cops and the protesters are getting into place.

The Republican National Committee is backing Roy Moore, a candidate who says homosexuality should be illegal.

There was another workplace shooting but so what? Nobody cares.

Filthy rich white guys who rip ordinary people off without consequence want us to believe that ending the estate tax is good for the average working class stiff. Working class Americans don’t worry about their kids getting to keep their fortunes after they die. They worry about their kids inheriting their debt.

Trump is really sticking to his stupid talking point that we’re one of the highest taxed nations in the world. Wrong. Scandanavian countries pay high taxes because they’re socialists. Ironically, people have more money in their pockets at the end of each month because they don’t go broke paying for health insurance and medical bills. They’re not stressed out, they don’t shoot each other, their kids aren’t hungry, they’re not strung out on drugs, and nobody is lying in the streets because they don’t have a home.

Rome is falling. Caesar is golfing.