Stanley Flopple
6 min readMar 12, 2017

70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp

70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp

Funny Status — Jokes — Fun Quotes

Friends, Have a look at the 70 Funny Status. You will love them all. The best chosen quotes and status lines for FUN. Read them all and share with your friends and family. The Best 70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp list starts here. You will surely like them.

70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp

Eat right, exercise, die anyway.

Doing nothing is very hard thing to do…you never know when to finish.

I’ve been using Google for 10 years and I have no idea who uses the “I’m Feeling Lucky” button.

Please be patient even a toilet can handle only one ass hole at a time.

Restaurant Advertisement: We serve food as HOT as your neighbour’s wife; And beer as COLD as your own.

🙂

If you can’t Change a Girl…..Change the Girl.

C.L.A.S.S- come late and start sleeping

🙂

Having a best friend with the same mental disorder is a blessing. LOL

If life gives you lemons, just add vodka.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp

Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.

That awkward moment when you realize that “deleting History” is more important than “creating History” nowadays.

I live in a world of fantasy, so keep your reality away from me!

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Everyone has an annoying friend. If you don’t have one, it’s probably you.

Women should not have children after 20. Really… 20 children are enough.

There are no winners in life… only survivors.

I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode.

I’m Jealous Of My Parents… I’ll Never Have A Kid As Cool As Theirs!

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp

I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice.

I wonder what happens when doctor’s wife eats an apple a day.

🙂

We live in the era of smartphones and stupid peoples.

Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.

I love my job only when I’m on vacation.

Faces YOU Make ON The Toilet lol (o_o) (>_<) (0_0) (^_^)

God made everything that has life, rest everything is made in China.

Just saw the most smartest person when I was in front of the mirror.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

We are WTF generation …. WhatsApp, Twitter and Facebook

😀

70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp

It may look like I’m deep in thought, but 99% of the time I’m just thinking about what food to eat later.

My father always told me, ‘Find a job you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.

I want someone to look at me the way I look at cupcakes!!

Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs. send him to KFC.

Dear MATH, stop asking to find your X, she’s not coming back.

Don’t steal. That’s the government’s job.

My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. lol

A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.

Did anyone else notice the sound if you click the like button on my status?

If time does not wait for you, don’t worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life.

70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp

Always wear cute pajamas to bed you’ll never know who you will meet in your dreams.

All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.

Fact: Phone on silent mode- 10 Missed call… Turns volume to loud- Nobody calls all day!!

If College has taught us anything, it’s texting without looking

🙂

No, I’m not feeling violent, I’m feeling creative with weapons.

People call me mike .. You can call me tonight.. :p

It’s been 70+ years, Tom. You’re never going to eat Jerry

🙂

There’s like 7 billion people in this world and no one wants to date me. I hate this world … huh

If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, nobody else wanted them either

🙂

I would probably die of sleep deprivation if Facebook added a dislike button

70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp

The winner of the rat race is still a rat.

God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me

😛

6 Peg Loading ..

😀

If you are going to speak bad things about me on my back, come to me. I’ll tell you more.

I’ve had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.

🙂

We all have that one skinny friend that eats more than fat person.

Google just called… Google said, “Someone is looking for you”.

Today’s Relationships: You can touch each other but not each others phones.

A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.

Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software…it’s called #Monday, please fix it

70 Funny Status Funny Jokes For Kids and Fun Quotes For WhatsApp

If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Some people should have multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.

Seeing a spider is nothing. The problem is when it disappears.

Whoever says “Good Morning” on Monday’s deserves to get slapped

🙂

There’s no such thing as addiction, there’s only things that you enjoy doing more than life

Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.

Everything funnier when your supposed to be quiet..

My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death..!!

When I’m on my death bed, I want my final words to be “I left one million dollars in the…

I look at people sometimes and think ….. Really?? That’s the sperm that won.

Funny Quotes — Funny Jokes and Status For WhatsApp

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Stanley Flopple

Hi, I’m Stanley. I’m a director living in United States. I am a fan of painting, homesteading, and DIY. I’m also interested in cycling and entrepreneurship.