The narcissist’s thirst for power and control is at the heart of their manipulation — Abuse, of any kind, is based on the cyclic dynamic of power and control. This is where the victim is in the passenger seat of a relationship with a maniac driving. The victim, unknowingly, has handed over his or her power, and now the relationship is a threat to the…

Propel Your Own Healing After Narcissistic Abuse — Narcissists don’t ‘do’ change. They are who they are, pathologically narcissistic, at the core level. It is likely they couldn’t change even if they did genuinely find a reason to reexamine how they live and treat others. Their defense mechanisms would jump right in, and they’d go right back to…

Never question their authority or else — Narcissists go for the jugular. My narc aunt made a false report to child protective services. She said that my child was at significant risk of being abused and neglected and that they needed to do a well-being check. This came directly after a huge blowout my aunt and I…

The narcissist’s projections and intentional infliction of shame — Shame is the drive that creates pathological narcissists and keeps their victims feeling trapped, stuck, and hopeless. Because shame is at the core of the narcissist, it is not ironic that shame is the drive with which narcissists use to control their victims. Let’s take a look at Joseph Burgo’s…

How the grandiose and the vulnerable narcissist coexist at once in the same person — Narcissistic personality disorder is a spectrum disorder that presents in two main subtypes: grandiose and vulnerable. Also referred to as overt and covert. Make no mistake, both are narcissists, with distorted egos, who share many of the same traits, as listed in the DSM5. It is helpful to think of…

A short story about my narcissistic aunt — Toxic people reign for control. Truth be told, they suck at controlling their own lives! Yet they feel entitled to control others; even when they do so very badly! This is one of the adverse effects of pathological narcissism. Toxic people use your ‘weaknesses’- traits, insecurities, life circumstances, you name…

Awareness and boundaries help keep them out — Learning to identify toxic personality traits can save one a lot of grief; sometimes even their life. Toxic people run rampant in society, disguised as friends, lovers, colleagues, neighbors, and many other community members. Basically, they’re everywhere. …

After all, you are living in their world, not yours — One of the telltale signs of narcissistic abuse is feeling invalidated in your relationship. Upon expressing your feelings, the narcissist responds with a shocking lack of empathy. He or she mocks, dismisses, or ignores your values, concerns, and emotions. …

Try to just listen and shut up — When you see a friend struggling with an issue you can’t relate to, there is no reason to say what you would or wouldn’t do in their situation; because you’re not in it. Understand that you don’t understand. Maybe even be open to learning something. But please don’t turn it…