Global Citizen Or Vagrant

From 9 years ago at my dorm in London.

This is the 4th Chinese New Year I’m far away from my home country. When some of my friends are really proud of their global citizen identity, I barely feel the same way.

It’s actually unusually for me to feel this way since I have spent most of my life in China — close to 90% if you want to know the exact number, but the thing for me was I never feel any belonging in any city across the world. San Francisco is the 6th city I have lived longer than a year and it doesn’t seem it would be the last one.

There was a branding study addressing this group of cosmopolitan. They keep changing place and live in a completely strange city. However, part of of our mind needs to seek familiarity. These are low hierarchy on Maslow pyramid — it’s more like safety. That’s why I need to find some Chinese to celebrate Chinese New Year Eve when I was in London or here, while I never felt I wanted to celebrate it when I lived in China.

BBD did a great job to document Chinese New Year last year. I almost cried when I watched it. I realized the reason I tried so hardly to leave and betray all my past was because my origin deeply rooted in me and it’s impossible to eradicate.

But I can’t go back or I don’t want to go back. I become a vagrant. Fortunately, this lack of identity never made me anxious. Rather, it’s fun to be on the road all the time. It’s a spirit about adventure and courage — the courage to start from scratch any time.

So I’m proud of my identity too. It’s just different from my friends — I’m not global citizen but vagrant.