When God is silent
If you’re like me, you value silence. In a fast-paced world where everything is ever-changing, you rarely get even two seconds of silence. Even when you’re alone in your apartment, your neighbors will be screaming or arguing on the phone or playing loud music. You can never get your silence.
But if you’re also like me, silence can drive you crazy. Especially in a conversation when you expect someone to be talking because there’s an unresolved issue. Instead of actively trying to figure things out, they passively just let things aside and maybe even change the topic.
And if you’re like me, you like talking. You like to say what’s on your mind and when you don’t have the avenue to do so, when it becomes awkward and you speak your heart out without getting a response, you go crazy.
Sometimes, silence comes up in a conversation with God, too.
You cry your heart out to God, you ramble about your problems to God because you can’t handle it anymore. You ask the hard questions to God, even after a long time of avoiding the hard question because you’re afraid of the answer. But when you do get the courage to ask, you feel like God isn’t giving you a response.
If you’re like me, that can be the hardest thing to deal with. A hard no is an even better response than just nothing. At least you know He’s there. At least you know He’s saying no for a reason. And at least you know that He cares about you enough to say no.
Well if you’re feeling like God is giving you the silent treatment, consider this.
It’s so easy to think that when God gives you no response it’s because He doesn’t care about you.
But don’t give up yet. He’s still there. He still loves you. And he’s silent for a reason. It may be for different reasons, but let me just tell one possible reason, which I feel like is what God is trying to teach me:
You’re not ready for the answer.
It’s so easy, honestly, to get defensive when you hear this. God, what do you mean I’m not ready? I want to know. Now. I can’t think, I can’t live, I can’t go on with my life until I know what the answer is. Can’t You understand that?
Well, God still wants to prepare you for the answer. He still wants to shape your character, build your dependence in Him and train your patience. He wants to know that in order to take in the hard answer, you’re going to have to rely on Him 100 percent. No less.
So just take it easy. Don’t get too caught up waiting on one thing or you’ll miss other wonderful things in life and other beautiful life lessons. Live in the moment, but be in constant conversation with God. Be open to the little things that He wants to teach you. These little dependencies will train you to fully trust God. And maybe these little things will finally point to that big answer you’re waiting for.
When you finally understand it later, you’ll realize that the little lessons He taught you can serve you well in the future. All you need now is patience and open ears to hear His voice.