You deserve a perfect tribute, but I’m going to write something for you anyway.

A lot of people are talking about you; I want to talk to you. This probably isn’t the best place to do it, but it’s a beautiful place to do it and at the very least you deserve that.

As a photographer, I think a lot about life’s meaning and how to capture it in perfect moments. People have been posting things about you on Instagram, Facebook, the news. They make me sort of angry — probably just a visceral reaction, but mostly I think you deserve something more meaningful, or at least that could help the rest of the world beyond the comments in the section below. I’m not sure how you feel about these. I wish I knew a lot more about how you felt. Mostly, I just wish I asked.

These past days, I’ve tried to focus on the perfect moments I was lucky enough to have with you, and ones we talked about having in the future. I am fortunate to have over 200 moments of your extraordinary life captured on my desktop. It’s pretty neat, scrolling through those photos and watching your life unfold through glimpses. You grew up in those glimpses. Being able to share them with your family is a beautiful, wonderful gift.

Of course, none of this will never make up for the fact that I didn’t ask you the right questions when I should have. We drifted over the years, but I still had every means to express something. Instead, I’m sitting here in a cafe in Copenhagen, half a world from the people I love most and even further from you, and I’m feeling very confused and very alone.

I miss you, I love you, and I wish with all my heart we could’ve shared a few more of those moments.