WHY AND HOW I UNLOCKED MY SEXUALITY
Breaking out of the ‘norm’ is never easy and for me it has been extremely hard. In a society that is driven by masculine energy and represses female sexuality, it took all my ounce of power to break free. I live in the Western Suburbs of Perth; a place with set beliefs and conservative ways of living. People live a structured life and move through their days in orderly fashion. It’s a place where no one really challenges the status quo, female power is minimised and those that wish to express are faced with a hard uphill battle. A life where the “norm” is settling and establishing a family and a place where individuals leave to explore their truth but come back when it’s time to grow old. A place to raise a family.
For me, stepping into power came with the commitment to understand and harness my sexuality. For those not educated about sexuality (majority of population), I am talking about the feminine and masculine energies in our body. Not sexual penetration! This is sex, not sexuality!
Let’s keep it simple!
Each of us reside in a body. That body is either male or female. However within the body is a composite of energy. The qualities of this energy have both masculine and feminine properties. So even though you’re a male or female, you still have both masculine and feminine energy within you. Weird huh!?
- Healthy masculine energy — compassionate, supportive, non-judgmental, understanding, still, strong and peace.
- Healthy feminine energy — playful, creative, nurturing, expressive, vulnerable, soft, flow, pleasure
We live in a society dominated by masculine energy and NOT in the healthy way. We judge, criticise, critic, condemn, push, dominate, and control. We spend our day to day lives meeting tasks, ticking deadlines and “getting shit done”. As a result we CRUSH the healthy feminine and then inturn become needy, dependant, emotional, reactive and depressed. A vicious and turmoil cycle that only leads us on a downhill slope.
We become consumed by work, experience severe levels of stress, ruin relationships and are completely dominated by this masculine nature. So what do we do? We turn to alcohol, drugs, excessive exercise, throw ourselves into work, take extended holidays. We do anything to escape this unhealthy masculine by numbing our pain to enhance the natural flow and ease of the feminine. We are in constant battle within ourselves of trying to find balance and express. By leading too much one way, the other starts screaming and vice versa.
How do we live a life where we are constantly in balance? Discipline! Personally, I desire a life that is free, expressive, creative, passionate and truthful. I wish every day to be in flow so my life becomes a holiday. Cliche I know, but it’s already happening! In order to live this, I have to be completely in touch with the sexual energy I bring to the world and therefore both my feminine and masculine energy have to be onboard. I have to constantly ensure I am not repressing my femininity in an increasingly dominant masculine society. Hard work…
Where do I start. Three things.
The first thing I had to do was take the commitment to myself that I would do “whatever it took.” It was choosing me above everyone else and ensuring my happiness was always my number #1 priority. Now this might sound easy, but it’s not! I grew up a people pleaser and therefore I have had to completely shift the belief that putting myself first is not selfish. This first step, in itself took a fuckload of work, so if anything I suggest you start right there.
The second step was accepting that things might change and those things might be relationships, friendships, work situations, living arrangements. This was hard. Watching friends fall at the way-side and finding certain people stopped calling was not something that was easy to accept. At times I definitely wanted to stop and to conform to fit in. But when you start to do the work, there really is no turning back. By letting things go, I allowed space for unbelievable things to come through. Work opportunities, new friendships, incredible relationships, and more self-growth. As my body started to open, opportunities and new adventures started to come flooding through.
Thirdly… consistency! This part is HUGE! It is very, very, very easy to reach the pain barrier and run away. Trust me I did this a million times and I see so many doing it on a regular basis. When we hit pain, we’ve hit the crux and it is the strength in these moments to sit with it, feel it and gently move through it that provides the jewels. I coach women specifically at these points. It is these points that are the most challenging but it is these points that we reclaim our power. I see so many staying in relationships, work situations, current living situations because they can’t deal with this pain barrier. I am here to tell you that if you want change, power and creativity, you have to learn to get pretty damn comfortable with pain!
There is so much more that takes place, but when we initially come with the above intentions, we can start to really do the work. We begin to cultivate high levels of compassion and understanding and inturn allow our true nature to rise and be expressed. Our feminine (creative energy) jumps up to the forefront and our masculine stands at the back. We start to lead a creative life on our own terms and with that comes abundance, success and power. Fuck yes!
Sexuality unlocks your creative power. So if you want to create your own life on your own terms with your own rules, then you need to get your unhealthy masculine energy out of the way. Femininity needs to be felt, expressed and heard. It must to sit at the forefront whilst the masculine holds the back. In a masculine driven society, this is not something that happens overnight. You will hit judgement, resistance, criticism and confusion. It therefore requires a lot of hard work, discipline, a daily practice, consistency, determination and most importantly, love. To be authentically you, express your gifts and be of true service to the world, your sexuality can not be ignored.
Unlocking this creative power delivers success. It is the understanding and knowing that no one is you and that is your gift. It is creating the life you want, on your own terms, in your given power. It is allowing yourself to be completely seen and to be of complete service to the world. It is an act of surrender, flow, courage and discipline. It is most certainly the road outside the norm but a road of unlimited opportunity, success, abundance and power. It is a road that you MOST DEFINITELY want to take!