As all productive individuals do, I spent the morning catching up on episodes of First Dates. I am the epitome of a dedicated student.
With each episode, I become more and more curious about this so-called “spark”. The majority of the couples that feature on the programme end up not wanting to see each other again, even the ones who seem to really hit it off. More often than not, they put it down to the fact there was just no spark.
But does there have to be a spark right away?
It may sound like a ridiculous question, and you may say “if there’s no spark it’ll never work”, but I’m not so sure.
There’s a part of me that thinks the spark, like everything else in a relationship, has to develop over time. Just because you don’t feel that surge of electricity in the first hour you spend with a person, it doesn’t mean they can’t still be the person for you. If you’re a shy, reserved person, it might take you a bit longer to open yourself up to letting the spark in.
In all honesty I don’t think I had a spark in either of my relationships at the very beginning. It cultivated over time, and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. Although, having said that, I do think I’ve had that instant spark. It’s happened to me once that I’m aware of. Didn’t do much good, like. And that’s my point.
It seems to me that the people you instantly spark with don’t necessarily lead to anything, relationships or otherwise; but the people you don’t initially feel a spark with can go on to be the great loves of your life. Don’t put all your faith in that one, minor detail.
First Dates has taught me, if anything, that sparks are hard to come by. If you get one, then great. Fantastic. If you don’t, doesn’t mean you should give up on them and keep looking just yet. Your spark could just be taking its time to ignite.
“Be you, and the right person will embrace you” — Fred Sirieix