Trump Honors Ted Cruz’s Father For Assassinating A Democratic President
Allan Ishac

ABC News Police waiting for bombs sent to Democrats. I did not do it.

Evilly inspired by Allan Ishac’s

Trump Honors Ted Cruz’s Father For Assassinating Democratic President

President tells son of JFK assassin, “You’re beautiful, your crazy Dad is beautiful, we need more beautiful cutthroats like the Cruz’s”


Today my wife drove me to see one of my doctors, mulling over whether my leg can be saved from amputation. I now have the equivalent of an entire international medical school convening on my mysterious leg. My main doctor is Polish-Japanese, recently returned from Afghanistan where his army reserve unit sent him to provide medical assistance to USA Army troops trying to pacify the Indian Kush (which are both the mountains of Pakistan and a very desirable strain of marijuana that grows in those mountains. As my doc (who also is named Steven (except he spells it incorrectly) is a pretty good guy he also provided medical services to Taliban prisoners. He was under a lot of stress because his wife had been pregnant with their first child when he got marching/sailing/flying orders to Afghanistan.

He mad it back alive, telling me he was in the safest place to be because he was camped next to the Taliban prison camp; the least likely place for the Taliban rebels to fire rockets as they fired on the invading USA soldiers.

As going to the doctor over and over again is the most boring thing one can imagine, I try to find out about my medical team.

How did you meet your wife?

I asked him.

She is a Physician’s Assistant from a medical school in Brazil.

Dr. Steven told his patient Stephen Kahn (me)

I parked the information in my failing brain. That was a year or two ago.

Today I met another doctor, I will call, Dr. Josh, studying my perplexing leg. He took me off antibiotics (which has not cured my leg but has thoroughly messed my ability to shit properly). Dr. Josh said

Stephen [me] there is something wrong with your blood flow.

Dr. Josh (who had previously consulted with Dr. Steve (my main doctor) said,

I am going to consult with someone else, As Dr. Steve is not in today.

After a few minutes, a very pretty young blond woman came into the examining room. Dr. Josh introduced her as Dr. Paula. I behaved myself and did not tell her that I have a sister named Paula who is the most irritating narcissistic madwoman on this planet whom I will exterminate with extreme prejudice if she leaves Southern California and lands on Whidbey Island, where I hid from the FBI, ATF, and Secret Service who are investigating bombs sent to prominent Democrats.

I noticed that Dr. Paula had a slight accent.

Where are you from?

I asked.


She politely and snarkily responded.

My demented, senile brain blurted


Good guess!

She merrily responded.

I realized I had hit pay dirt.

I bet you are Dr. Steven’s lovely bride!

I crowed.

She tossed her pretty and brainy head in a charming way.

It’s been a long time since I was a bride.

She then examined my leg.

I am senile, but if you are still with me I was responding to Allan Ishac’s riff about Donald Trump and Ted Cruz, living proof of the ancient cliche

Politics makes strange bedfellows.

Daily Express. Minutes before Don and Ted hit the mattress.

How to respond. As my mind has gone over the edge a long time ago, the face and words of Newt Gingrich floated before my eyes. Remember Newt?

House of Representatives — Georgia Peach, Not yet neutered Newt Gingrich

Newt, to put it as glamorously and positively as I can, is what as known as a

Piece of Work


My favorite characteristic about Newt is his behavior as an admirable icon of ethical male moral behavior in his love life.

The following long excerpt comes from Wikipedia.

Marriages and children
Gingrich has married three times. In 1962, he married Jacqueline May “Jackie” Battley (February 21, 1936 — August 7, 2013), his former high school geometry teacher, when he was 19 years old and she was 26.[202][203] Although Jackie has insisted that her relationship with Gingrich began when he was 16, Gingrich has denied such claims, asserting instead that he was already 18 at the time. The marriage produced two children: Kathy Gingrich Lubbers, married to Paul Lubbers, is president of Gingrich Communications,[204] and Jackie Gingrich Cushman, the wife of Jimmy Cushman, Jr., is an author, conservative columnist, and political commentator.[205] Gingrich had several extramarital affairs during his first marriage.[206]
In the spring of 1980, Gingrich filed for divorce from Jackie after beginning an affair with Marianne Ginther.[207][208]
In 1984, Jackie Battley Gingrich told The Washington Post that the divorce was a “complete surprise” to her. According to Jackie, in September 1980, Gingrich and their children visited her while she was in the hospital, recovering from surgery for cancer, and Gingrich wanted to discuss the terms of their divorce.[209] Gingrich has disputed that account.[210] Although Gingrich’s presidential campaign staff continued to insist in 2011 that his wife requested the divorce, court documents obtained by CNN from Carroll County, Georgia, indicated that Jackie had asked a judge to block the process stating that although “she has adequate and ample grounds for divorce … she does not desire one at this time [and] does not admit that this marriage is irretrievably broken.”[211]
According to L. H. Carter, Gingrich’s campaign treasurer, Gingrich said of his first wife: “She’s not young enough or pretty enough to be the wife of the President. And besides, she has cancer.”[212][213] Gingrich has denied saying it.[214] The daughter of the former Linda May Clay and Wilbur Allen Battley, Jackie Gingrich was a native of Columbus, Georgia. She was a deacon and active volunteer in the First Baptist Church of Carrollton, Georgia. She died in Atlanta at the age of 77.[215]
In 1981, six months after his divorce from his first wife was final, Gingrich wed Marianne Ginther.[216][217][218][219] Marianne helped control their finances to get them out of debt.[220] She did not, however, want to have the public life of a politician’s wife.[221] Gingrich’s daughter Kathy Lubbers described the marriage as “difficult”.[222]
Gingrich alongside wife Callista at a townhall in Derry, New Hampshire
In 1993, while still married to Marianne, Gingrich began an affair with House of Representatives staffer Callista Bisek, more than two decades his junior.[223] Gingrich was having this affair even as he led the impeachment of Bill Clinton for perjury related to Clinton’s own extramarital affair.[224][225] Gingrich filed for divorce from Marianne in 1999, a few months after she had been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.[226] The marriage produced no children. On January 19, 2012, Marianne alleged in an interview on ABC’s Nightline that she had declined to accept Gingrich’s suggestion of an open marriage.[227] Gingrich disputed the account.[228]
In August 2000, Gingrich married Callista Bisek four months after his divorce from Marianne was finalized.[229] He and Callista live in McLean, Virginia.[230] In a 2011 interview with David Brody of the Christian Broadcasting Network, Gingrich addressed his past infidelities by saying, “There’s no question at times in my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate.”[218][219] In December 2011, after the group Iowans for Christian Leaders in Government requested that he sign their so-called “Marriage Vow”, Gingrich sent a lengthy written response. It included his pledge to “uphold personal fidelity to my spouse”.[231]

I admit that I am a fanatical atheist. I admit that I have considerable prejudice against Catholics. I am going to quote a little bit more from the Wikipedia article about Newt Gingich.

Raised as a Lutheran,[232] Gingrich was a Southern Baptist in graduate school. He converted to Catholicism, Bisek’s faith, on March 29, 2009.[233][234] He said: “over the course of several years, I gradually became Catholic and then decided one day to accept the faith I had already come to embrace”. He decided to officially become a Catholic when he saw Pope Benedict XVI, during the Pope’s visit to the United States in 2008: “Catching a glimpse of Pope Benedict that day, I was struck by the happiness and peacefulness he exuded. The joyful and radiating presence of the Holy Father was a moment of confirmation about the many things I had been thinking and experiencing for several years.”[235] At a 2011 appearance in Columbus, Ohio, he said, “In America, religious belief is being challenged by a cultural elite trying to create a secularized America, in which God is driven out of public life.”[134]
The Catholic Church recognizes his third marriage as a valid marriage, based on an annulment granted for his second marriage and the passing of his wife from his first.

I will rashly make a prediction here. By the end of 2020, Newt Gingrich will become the first American chosen to be Pope and simultaneously elected as Emperor of the United States of America.