I can’t completely understand. Maybe I don’t understand at all.
I can only say — it just sucks that it is this way, that something put upon you by others becomes something you must yourself fight against. Like — how did this happen? Why did you get to do this to me?
I have almost no idea how to fix it because it’s deep and systemic. I only know that for me, I am working to make it no longer be true.
I hope there are islands of sanity for you in this sea of ignorance.