I Listened to Emotionally Vulnerable Strangers on Reddit
The power of peer-to-peer emotional support communities
Before I tell my story, I want to clarify that I’m not trained as a clinical psychologist or therapist. My only exposure with mental health counseling has been serving as a suicide hotline counselor for two years at San Francisco Suicide Prevention. Beyond that, I yearn to provide a kind and non-judgmental ear for my peers in my daily life.
/r/KindVoice
I’m interested in the intersection of technology and mental health (I’m planning a Mental Health Hackathon in San Francisco at CIIS, Feb 3–4). After delving into the space more, I stumbled across an incredible online community: https://www.reddit.com/r/KindVoice/.
/r/KindVoice is a matchmaking community of sorts, which allows people who feel lonely or depressed to talk to others who are offering to listen. I signed up to offer a kind voice, out of a mixture of good will and curiosity.
After “redditors” direct-messaged me, we set up a system to communicate over Facebook Messenger and chat asynchronously. On average, each redditor sent about five messages/day. I talked to seven different redditors, and three of the conversations died out after the first few days, because they stopped responding.
For the others, I’ve developed a recurring messaging relationship with them that’s lasted several weeks — the redditor will message me when feeling down or sad, and I’ll offer some kind words and listen. I’ll also check in with them on a weekly basis. We talk about a variety of topics, but usually it ends up boiling down to just listening.
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”- Leo Buscaglia
It’s remarkable and fascinating to me that something like this could occur — two strangers on the internet, chatting to one another, one offering a kind voice to the other. A beautiful and inspiring community of individuals, and I’m grateful to be a part of it.
Emotional Support in the 21st Century
Therapy can be a fantastic resource for many individuals, but I’m increasingly curious about the power of peer-to-peer relationships and “befriending” as a mitigator for people who are feeling sad or lonely.
Often, people who are in distress or emotional pain don’t reach out to therapists — perhaps the model of interaction doesn’t work, they’re too nervous to engage with the therapist, or their sadness is momentary, not long-term. Surely, /r/KindVoice has its own set of problems: listeners have little context on those in need and developing an online-only relationship can be challenging.
How can we innovate on the ways we think about helping those with emotional distress? I believe /r/KindVoice is a fantastic experiment, and I’m excited to see how society’s treatment of emotional support will continue to evolve.
Please share this article by clapping 👏 below. If you’re interested in innovating on mental health more, check out the Mental Health Hackathon I’m planning in San Francisco at CIIS on February 3–4, 2018. You can also like us on Facebook for more updates.
