Men and women are different
This shouldn’t need to be said, but in a world so obsessed with ‘acknowledging’ (imposing) some contrived notion of ‘equality’ it’s time to speak up. It’s said that humans and chimps differ by only 2% of their DNA. Considering men and women share only 43 out of 44 chromosomes (yes, there is a genetic difference between men and women, and it’s the Y chromosome) it’s arguable that human men and women are more different from each other than from chimps. So just chew on that for a minute.
We’re a culture so obsessed with embracing diversity, but we still refuse to do so for this most (and for those who don’t believe in the idea of race, the only) fundamental difference between us. Women are great! Men are great! There’s no arguing who’s better. That’s silliness. But women can bear children, and tend to live about four years longer. And men get drafted and have to go to war. That’s some pretty serious inequality, but it’s also a pretty deep part of who we are as humans, not something to be corrected for, per se.
Women can raise children, and design bridges and lots of other things, and if that’s what get’s them up in the morning, great! But I’m tired of seeing women judged as inferior because they want to raise babies, because that’s a really important job, arguably the most important job. Because bridges collapse, businesses come and go, but the human race will probably go on, and perhaps the best thing we can offer the future is to be good parents.
Guys can be pretty good at parenting, too, and it bugs the hell out of me that nine times out of ten when a couple can’t work things out and goes through a divorce, the woman automatically gets the kids. I think women are generally pretty well-equipped for motherhood, but no one ever seems to question this, or consider whether that’s really the best choice.
So your child likes playing with dolls? Great! Might be a sign that they want to raise kids. Likes drilling holes in the ground and placing firecrackers? Might be an engineer one day. Encourage their passion, whatever it is, and whatever their gender. But I’d give it better than even odds that it’s a boy playing with firecrackers.
Remember the days when one parent stayed home and took care of the household? Nobody seems to remember some of the benefits of this, like the labor market only being half as large and therefore wages being considerably higher. That’s just supply and demand, basic economics. Not just that, but that means those kids got a whole lot of attention from one of the parents, and probably had home cooked meals. Show me two kids, one who gets home-cooked meals and one who eats crap out of a box. Guess which one is likely to be obese and suffer low self-esteem? And show me two kids, one raised on electronic toys while being dragged around on endless errands by two working parents, and one raised full-time with human interaction. Which one is going to be well-adjusted and have better social skills?
So I’m not saying women have to do this role and men that one, because we’ve all got different strengths. But I’d say the ‘traditional’ roles evolved because of some inherent differences in skills and that we’d all be happier if we stopped fighting our own nature and moved beyond the gender wars. We’re never going to think the same way, so embrace and respect the implicit strength that comes from our masculinity/femininity. Discover the essence of your partner and see what you can build together!