Finding strength in rejection
Reject, rejected, rejection, the word in any form has a negative connotation and typically rips at our emotional core. It triggers negative emotions in most that are on the receiving end of it. But you don’t have to let it destroy you life.
Here are a few areas with possible ways to manage and deflect the damage of being rejected, by examining the experience in a positive light, to produce a better outcome.
JOB
• Let’s say you have an application or resume rejected from a job you really wanted. I am not suggesting that you will avoid the initial negative reaction to news like this, especially if you are out of a job or even if you’re trying to get out of a job you really dislike. But look at it this way, this could be the universes’ way of protecting you from entering into an environment that is not a good fit, not safe or it may even be keeping you from missing out on applying for and getting the job you never dreamed you could, one that is perfect for you. There could be so many possible reasons for rejection, that have nothing to do with your lack of ability or skill level to perform.
• It may also afford you the opportunity to re-examine what you really want, revamp your resume, re-educate yourself, etc and don’t be afraid to ask questions, if they are willing to offer feedback.
• If not, perhaps consider seeking professional career counseling or coaching to assist in pinpointing any adjustments or improvements you may need or to guide you in a more suitable and focused direction to increase your probability for landing that dream job.
RELATIONSHIP
• If you’ve lived long enough, you probably know what it feels like to be rejected by a love interest or get dumped by at least one love in your life. Nine times out of ten, you may not have realized it then or even now, but it could have very well been another act of protection from the universe. Of course when it happens and sometimes long after, it may feel like the end of your life. A broken heart is not something we aspire to experience, but it happens and oftentimes for good reason. You just have to let go, heal and believe that it is not the end for you.
• Again, like a job, it could be that it’s not the right person for you or as hard as this may be to accept, you may not be the right person for them. It doesn’t mean you or they deserve to be alone, although in some cases either of you or both could be in need of some serious “me time” and “some work on me time.” In that case being rejected is a very good thing. The better we are at loving ourselves, the better we are at attracting the best person for us. In the end it usually works out for the best, if we allow it.
SOCIETY
• Getting rejected by society, your community or even family is a tough emotion to process, even for the most emotionally tough, especially as children, because to fully live in the world, you have to co-exist with others in various aspects of life. As adults, we have a few more coping skills available to us to help us navigate and develop a deeper sense of resolve. However, they have to be sought and applied, otherwise the emotional-intelligence adulthood is under-developed.
• But, if you embrace the silver lining in being rejected, it inspires you to self-examine yourself and strengthen your resilience. It reminds you that you are alive and this is typically where the rubber meets the road in self-awareness. You will either embrace the idea, that if you are living your life to its fullness, without bringing harm to others, rejection is still inevitable, because there are people who may never embrace you and that has to be okay with you. You have to also recognize it has nothing to do with you and your life must go on, it is your gift to you and to those who love you.
• The ultimate deflection of rejection is being one hundred percent okay with being you in the face of being rejected; it will often sting, just handle the pain appropriately and keep on living!
