“Here..eat, eat…”
…you’ll get stronger

My day consists of feeding my father from time to time.
My day also consists of giving him suppositories and enemas that have a steroid solution.
My day also consists of changing his diapers from time to time.
I have no problems with this routine.
However, sometimes feeding him becomes so overwhelming that I start to cry.
Why do I cry?
Because I can no longer voice my opinion on his eating habits, which, for all intents and purposes, is diminishing…
However, his body can not sustain the amount of food given to him.
Although I give him suppositories and give him stool softeners, he has yet to have a bowel movement. Which means he is impacted. Which means I have to reach in and unimpact his bowels.
Sigh.
Most of the problems could be resolved, if his diet were to change.
But that’s not going to happen anytime soon…
I’m tired.
I watch as my father becomes more agitated and belligerent as he eats.
He’s not going to get stronger. I know this. All the food in the world will not make him better.
I can’t get through to them.
But I will be digging out shit out of his rectal cavity, while I feel like shit.
