Like it or not, people judge your ability and ideas on the energy you project. Even Superman gets ignored when he puts on the mild demeanor of Clark Kent. Like Superman, having a commanding presence is something you can control.
This is counter-intuitive, but it’s an emotion that is self-reinforcing. So if you aren’t feeling great about yourself, particularly at a moment when you need to be on, try these tips.
Don’t strain, just lightly turn up the corners of your mouth and beam gladness from your eyes. You’ll feel things brighten as the feedback loop works between your face and your brain. See, you’re fine. Everything’s fine. It must be — just look at your face.
Imagine your body filling up with liquid confidence. Like in those guided meditations, it may be a glowing thick syrup. Confident people are typically relaxed and free of any sudden or erratic movement. You should feel stronger as it fills your thighs, chest, and biceps. It’s pure strength.
When it reaches the top of your scalp, picture a steady flame over your head. Let it center you and pull you upright.
Being well prepared in the first place is the best source of confidence. If you do your homework and you know your stuff, it will show. When interviewing or presenting, having questions or talking points memorized will work wonders. Also, try envisioning the moment ahead of time and see yourself achieving a successful outcome.
Okay, so you might do all this and still something unexpected comes up that throws you off your game. They ask that one question, or you realize you didn’t account for something. Or your nervous. That’s fine — you’re fine. Don’t let it ruffle your countenance.
Square your shoulders and place your feet firmly on the ground. If your hands are shaking at all, keep them in your lap and don’t bring them into view. Take time to gather your thoughts before speaking and be deliberate. Listen more and say less in this situation.
Alright, so everything is way off script. The demo isn’t working or it turns out no one actually needs what your selling. Just go with what is happening. It’s fine, you’re totally fine. The whole experience was only a push-up anyway. Smile and nod. Try asking questions and getting others talking. Things can’t go wrong when you let go of expectations and have no attachments. You are water, flowing down — unstoppable.
6. Listen to confidence boosting music
I have a playlist I listen to before important presentations or life-changing meetings. If I just need a lift, I’ll listen to the whole thing. Otherwise, I may listen to one song that has the right energy for what I need. For example, if I truly need to perform I’ll listen to the Superman Theme on repeat beforehand. If I had too much coffee and need something more calming I’ll listen to “You and Who’s Army” by Radiohead.
Here’s my Confidence playlist.
Please share in the comments if you have your own go to tunes for this, or share your confidence boosting ideas.