Shadow of the Ego
I am like many people who have attempted to commit themselves to a consistent practice of meditation; I am dedicated to finding ways to avoid it. Like exercise, I love it once the endorphins kick in, but the major battle is always waged in my head before I hit the pavement or the meditation mat. This internal wrestling that Buddha calls ‘resistance’ is the tug-o-war between my ego and my heart. My heart is an amazing self who uses love as her guide through practice of compassion and forgiveness, but her evil twin called ego, wastes so much of their shared energy in resistance over things that don’t serve the greater good. Things like; fear, anxiety, depression, frustration, over-working, over-thinking. It has been tough to keep the clanging ego contained long enough to even hear the music of universal wisdom and truth that the heart represents. So I suppose this is why I dance the dance of meditation, for a few nano-seconds of time I can open up to a portal of nothing and everything co-existing simultaneously where focus exists without trying and the heart can step away from the shadow of ego long enough to be heard.