I didn’t know there was such a thing.
I’ve mentioned before that I’ve known several men who have been screwed by the system. My brother-in-law, and some of the male parents of my students, just to name a few. My heart goes out to you.
What I haven’t told you is I was a mother who ran. I didn’t ask for a dime (not that he had any to provide…he hadn’t worked the entire seven years we were married, and he had quickly snorted away the small inheritance my father had left me), but I ran for my life. I promise you, I am not just being melodramatic. The violence kept escalating, and my daughter was getting old enough to understand. I didn’t think he would have turned it on her, but I couldn’t take that chance, and I didn’t want her to have to live with what he was doing to me. In one of our last interactions, he pulled a gun on me (in front of her), and I was terrified she was eventually going to witness my murder.
I know this doesn’t make your story any less tragic, and it doesn’t excuse the way you or the others were treated, but I wanted to get it out in the open.
Anyway, I made my comment about prayers and positive thoughts before I got to the end of your piece, then my computer went dead. I’m sorry your son’s mom has other plans for him. I hope you can maintain the communication you both deserve.
He is an adult. Is there any possibility of you helping him come up with an alternative plan?