I don’t know why you say goodbye, I say hello

Yesterday we said goodbye to my father-in-law, the only father I’ve had for thirty years.

We came home from his memorial service to find this…

Who would have dreamed when we agreed to do this wedding nine months ago, it would fall on the same weekend? That the visitation and rehearsal would take place on the same day?

Yesterday was one of the most bittersweet days of my life. I got to hug our daughter and granddaughter, extended family and old, dear friends. Then I returned to the sunshine, birds singing, wedding preparations, celebrating, beauty everywhere. We ended the evening with a fire under the stars with friends.

The bride and groom are so sweet. Today they’ll float down the same aisle Ray walked me down (he thought it odd that I asked him to give me away to his own family, but I convinced him) exactly 19 years ago this weekend.

He played a part in almost every tree on this property. He planted the flowering crabs years ago, before we even moved the house here. The poplar branches that we literally just stuck in the ground one by one (the ones that are thirty feet tall now), came from a tree in his yard. He helped plant the maple grove my husband will tap soon enough.

The sign on the left says wish you were here. On the ladder are pictures of their loved ones in heaven.

It’s funny, but when we visit at his house now, his absence is…palpable. But here at home, on this land, I feel his presence everywhere.

I can’t thank him enough.

Author’s note: I’m so sorry I haven’t replied to your kind responses on my last piece. I promise you, I have read them and will return them as soon as I can find the words.