Dear young artist, if you are confused about what’s next
… so am I. A visual timeline of my own progression and an invitation for you to look into your own.
I recently looked for aiding material about how other artists (in my case, digital illustrators) are doing or how they managed when they were just starting out in their career. I am 24 and I finally got my first job as an illustrator in large company, which means great responsibility and although very honouring, it is fairly scary. So, why scared you wonder?
My history in a nutshell: I knew my life will develop around drawing since very young, I attended a High-School in Mathematics & Computer Science, a Faculty in Fine Arts, finished an Internship in Digital agencies and had the last job as a Logistics Manager in a startup.
As enumerated above, most parts of my life have been very opposite, but they all led to the person that I am today, that is the person that managed to land the job of my dreams. That’s super, but to me, 24 feels a bit late to start doing it. I emphasize my age because 24 feels very confusing — of course better than 18 or even 22 — but still confusing. It is a number that tells all the other adults that I arrived at the maturity necessary to understand responsibility and have some years of experience to back me up in the job I’m going to do next. That isn’t my case and this is where my fear is coming from.
How did I think to start writing about it
The past days I got inspired by the #10yearschallenge launched by Facebook and thought to look at the trails I left behind in everything I created since 2009. I wasn’t interested in the way I looked, but how I’ve been doing. I figured this would be my escape from the continuous fear of not doing enough and it would show me the real evolution that I forget about in the daily life. And it did and will continue to, now that I took the time to review that same path that brought me to where I am.
I am going to give my own life’s example in order to base the before & after and my learnings on. My main intention is to instigate the same exploration in you, the reader of this story, and let go at least for a while of the fear of not doing enough, or also recognised as not good enough.
If it happens that you don’t share the feeling, I still wish you a pleasant lecture, but as I’ve seen, many young artists feel this way.
My journey
2009–2010
In 2009 I was starting High-school, and before this I do not recall how interested or active I was with my arts. During these 2 years I got to know my literature professor who was directing the visual part of the High-School’s biannual magazine and managed to have some drawings selected for 3 of the issues. It felt like a huge deal back then and made me very proud, this glimpse of exposure I was receiving among my own peers. And because of this, I started experimenting with other things; and so I learnt about portraits.
2011–2012
This was the time when mostly everyone that got to know me figured out that drawing was my thing, and something very interesting happened. There was this unspoken respect towards the fact that I have this talent and my trying to hone it, so everyone around me was either supportive or accepting of who I was. This played a major role in the becoming of the person that I am today as an individual and artist, as retiring in my own universe and personal space didn’t have anything to do with “feeling down” or misunderstood — it was simply my creative moment.
The most support I got was by receiving a lot of commissions for portraits — this was my thing. I figured at that point, the only way I could turn more heads my way was by tickling something inside of them - a bit of narcissism. Soon, many that heard of me wanted a portrait done or knew somebody who wanted one done as a bespoke gift for anniversaries, etc. It was great to have work, thus continuous practice, coming my way and some sort of recognition, which I was again, really happy with.
When I first started, the portraits weren’t out of this world good — my present self reckons — but because it was a constant activity, I got better very soon.
2013
I was very happy to win myself a spot in a Fine Arts Faculty and, even then, some of the commissions were still coming in. As a student, any sort of income was heaven. I remember thinking that I was charging quite a low price in hopes that word of mouth advertisement would bring me more jobs, and it worked in that sense, but the amount of work that I was putting in was raising since I was getting better at it. What helped me stick with it was the idea that hard work will bring benefits at some point, so I was patient and kept accepting anything I could — sometimes to the point of overbooking my time.
2014
As any other young person — so I thought — I was dreaming of working with professionals and being introduced to big projects where I am recognised for my talent, and skill, and this is the main reason why I was putting my hours in. It didn’t really happen, but this mindset stuck with me until today. For this, I will be forever grateful to the young and dumbly positive me for teaching me this.
2015
Until my graduation, I kept pursuing the realistic style, but learnt in faculty that I needed to put more thought and meaning into my creations. I had to kiss goodbye all the faces that I’d drawn and try to do better, but in a different manner; but somehow always found a small window of possibility to use them again.
2016
In June 2016 I graduated and I took an internship in Denmark, as a Digital Designer in an agency. I was very pleased that all my portraits and new conceptual works made me look good and as the type of “creative” that they thought they were looking for, but this proved to be a very difficult relationship in the end.
I had a hard time learning how to manage my time, how to respect deadlines and how to stop getting attached to everything I was creating — and they are all linked together. It was a difficult pill to swallow realising that I couldn’t learn the ropes as quickly as I though I could, in order to feel prepared to join the workforce.
These were also the most changing and challenging 6 months of my life but which, in the end, brought me material for a decent portfolio. Now I had learnt how a brief looks, manage expectations from the team and a whole new medium — digital design and illustration.
2017
I was finally able to showcase something else than portraits and crazy faculty concepts and prove that I can, in fact, be employable and behave (yes, there is a popular belief that art students are very libertine and untameable). But what would you do if you suddenly came to the realisation that your portfolio is boring and not many will spend a minute to take a look at it?
It was a dreadful period and I felt lost. I thought then that if I cannot find a way to go forward from here, I could make a right for a while. This is when I took a regular job and just focused on getting my ducks in a row: paying bills and other legal liabilities in the new country I was living in.
But in retrospect, it is also the year that announced my full commitment to my artistic future — I created my separate Instagram account, Creativier.
I thought then that if I cannot find a way to go forward from here, I could make a right for a while.
A visual of your (clearly mine) feelings when things go left…
This became my very dramatic logo – the facepalm.
2018
For most of this year I started making excel sheets, setting reminders, getting used to the inner workings of Instagram, looking up hashtags, content subjects, organising everything I could so that I would manage to post 1 creation a week. It wasn’t supposed to be hard, but in the beginning, as I was building the habit as well, I did make a few skips. Nobody else from those 100 followers that I had then noticed it more than myself - but I sure did regret missing those posts.
So I got back in and just drew freely, anything I wanted. I think this would have to be marked as the first moment when I felt liberated and finally allowed myself to create without so much judgement. And it worked out for me. I don’t have a huge following as my artistic ego would desire in our current times, but what happened is that I got to make 1 creative task a week, 52 tasks a year, maybe more if I was feeling very inspired. That is without considering Inktober (an Instagram challenge where an artist makes a drawing a day for the entire month of October) that I am joining every year now.
This felt amazing and made a huge change by quite little effort — now I had accomplished the promise to myself of posting every week plus I have a nice gallery of posts I love. This innocent decision gave me perspective over how much more I could achieve if I gave myself more time to do it.
2019
This year, I am finally drawing everyday just like I wanted since graduation. Thanks to my beloved new job, I will enjoy every bit of it — the fear of new, the routine of everyday sketching, the moments of zoning-out-into-a-song-I-put-on-repeat-while-researching, the one too many coffees, the deadlines, the limitations of following guidelines and the responsibility of handing NOs and YESes.
Here is an illustration of me being happy with all my new accessories.
Because I’m an artist at heart, I will never be as organised as I would wish to be, but hopefully I managed to draw a nice timeline here. The thought I would love to leave with you as the reader, and hopefully a young artist, is this: be patient and work with no foreseeable purpose at first. Work aimlessly, tirelessly, be optimistic about your chances to succeed even if they aren’t obvious to you, in that moment. If you put the work in, somebody will surely notice you because that is something that trends will never wash away — the person willing to put in the effort in spite of the unwarranted reward.
You will discover your niche, you will find your crowd and voice, and for absolutely any style you choose to go with there will be a couple of people needing it and willing to throw the money at.
Just give yourself time. You won’t see overnight miracles, but you must already know that in our line of work. Look back 3, 5, 10 years behind and not to yesterday. You need to give yourself time and then others will give it too.
Your worst case scenario is not that bad
If you feel lost, remember how you forgot the last time when you felt lost. This feeling is not something meant to last for long. Realise that your down moments aren’t that bad, especially if you are in school having nothing else to do than learn. And if you aren’t in school but have to pay your bills, then there’s hope for you too. Try to get a job that will allow you to work in an office, but not one that requires heavy physical activity. This is guaranteed to make an artist crave to create in the few hours that are left in their spare time.
And if somehow you are both in school and on your own, and still going strong, you’ll be my boss one day.
Having an image of the worst case scenario will liberate you from your own limitations.
Trust yourself
I try to be realistic when I say I am sure I wasn’t a very good student and were I working even more than I did, it would have gotten me much farther. But this is me and this is what I have. So by using my own example, if I could come from making portraits in my 5 persons dorm room, to working with clients and collaborating with colleagues, while living in a different country, there isn’t much that can stop others either.
Don’t forget where you’re coming from; if you continue to do your own thing, you’ll find the confidence to throw yourself at opportunities.
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Feel free to share this with somebody you know could use this article, comment or write me here:
Next subject I’d like to approach is a simple guide for other artists that find an Illustrator job they love, with real examples and expectations in the first months on-boarding, based on my own experience after 6 months in my new position as an Illustrator.
Written on Feb 11th, 2019.
