I Was Addicted to Being Busy
I’ve got a confession. I’m obsessed with lists. I not only love lists, but in my delusion, I believe that they love me. Why else would they offer me purpose for every moment of the day? Little box after box to check off so I don’t have a free moment to feel guilty that I’m not working. Professional or personal, it didn’t matter. I just need to do something for my career or other projects. Otherwise, I’ll fidget and take out my phone, notepad, or other nearby device and try to work. I didn’t want a long relaxing dinner with friends. The hate I radiated at gatherings was felt by all.
I couldn’t help it. I was wasting time with this unproductive dinner! Why couldn’t they see that?
Does this sound crazy to you? Because it was. But it was an accurate depiction of how mentally I was unable to relax and settle down. I was addicted to being busy. Now, a lot of us like to be busy. The difference between a regular productive person and a busyness addict is that an addict is never satisfied. More and more things get added to the list, so no minute in the day is wasted.
As you can see this method is a recipe for burnout. So I had to learn to relax. I had to cure myself of my need to be busy. And through some mindset changes and hard work, I managed to do just that.
