The Real Minority

I grew up in center city Allentown, PA. My brother and I were the only white kids in the heavily minority neighborhood. At the time, I didn’t realize that whites were the majority. You certainly wouldn’t have known it from my city block. In fact, considering how despicably we were treated by the minorities you would have thought whites were the oppressed peoples.

Despite all that, it never dawned on me why I got picked on more than my brother. Why I felt nervous everytime I biked to my part time job whereas my brother talked often about all the places he’d gone on his bike. Stuff around the city he’d done late at night. Out at a time I wouldn’t, even in my mid teens, have considered ‘safe’.

But the truth is women are a minority no matter their color. And the #YesAllWomen tag isn’t about getting special treatment. It’s not about laying low our enemies or making men feel guilt. It’s about saying “no more” to the rape culture that persists post Patriarchal society.

Fair and Balanced

During High School I went to a private Baptist school. Boys were supposed to be boys and girls were supposed to be girls. Meanwhile our equality in God’s sight was a constant theme in my classes and in chapel. But in practical terms, females were more heavily restricted on dress code standards than males were.

Males had to wear collared shirts and pants that weren’t jeans. Also close toe shoes. Be clean cut and shaved.

Females had to wear blouses. But they couldn’t be low cut in the front. Spaghetti straps were off limits. Skirts had to be modest and preferably to the ankle, though they’d ok skirts that were knee length. No jean skirts. And a feminine hair cut was required. Earrings couldn’t be dangly. Nails had to be reasonable in length. And if there was a sports event, women had to wear culottes for PE and the sporting event. Shoes couldn’t be high heeled, though you could wear a wedge that was no more than 2 inches high. Sandals were allowed as long as they had a back strap around the heel and ankle. Close toed shoes were preferred. There was probably more, but these are the ones that stood out.

Now look at the size of those paragraphs. See how the males got about 2 lines? The females got…uh…one, two, a lot.

When I went to the military, it was a bit less repressed but still the women had many more rules for dress code than the males did. The uniforms were, till the past 2 years, made solely for men. This meant that body armor wouldn’t fit correctly on the female form. Which in turn meant, women weren’t provided the same protections male soldiers were offered.

Politics and Voices

But the inequality of treatment between men and women in the physical realm is fairly well documented. With very little done to deal with it. So women began speaking out online and joining the political realms with more outcry. All hail the B*tches! Right, guys?

Every female politician in the last presidential election got asked about kids or grandkids. Not the guys.

Every female politician got the full breakdown on who she was wearing and was it stylish enough? If not, they got the full take down. Not the guys.

If a female politician had a strong point of view [whether I agree with them or not], they got labeled “b*tch” by the opposing side. Sometimes there were sexual threats leveled at them because they dared to speak up and have a voice. But the topics they spoke on, in most cases, didn’t dwell on women’s rights or inequality. They could have spoken about the color of the sky and the male commentators [as well as not a few female harpies] would have skewered them.

What’s that old saying? A man’s opinionated but a woman’s a b*tch?

Modern Living in Suburbia

I’ve since left the military and moved with my family to a fairly suburban and quiet area of Maryland. The surrounding neighborhoods are swamped with families and stay at home moms. A heavy military feel in some areas as well.

So I can tell you that it is odd that you don’t see women walking alone. Almost always in groups of 2 or 3. Now one could argue that women like to chit chat while walking. Perhaps they have an accountability partner? But 75% or more NEVER being out alone? In Suburbia?

When I go for a drive, I don’t make eye contact with male drivers. I assume they’ll think I’m flirting. And that makes me nervous because my initial reaction is one of fear.

When I go for a walk and come across young males, I have a fight or flight feeling flood me.

When I go to the store, the guys almost always get served first if it’s a male store clerk. Bros before hoes, man.

No it’s not all men. Yes, women are well aware there are decent guys. And that’s why we know how many of ya’ll are crap.

I don’t want to sound bitter, but the truth is the more any woman thinks her life through, the more she’ll realize how much of her choices are limited by a patriarchal cast or a fear of ill treatment simply for being a female. Even the religious, ‘submit yourselves to your husband’ type are constantly quoting Proverbs 31. You know, that chapter that is about the kind of woman a guy should marry?

Verse 3 is one of my faves.

Do hnot give your strength to women,

Gotta watch them women, yo. The entire passage has resulted in an industry telling women what they have to be like to be ‘good enough’ for God much less a religious male.

And that is besides all the other quality passages about submission, God being cool with Rape, etc.

No woman is exempt from this treatment. And the ones who think they are simply haven’t come to realize what the rest of their female counterparts have. Women aren’t simply less than. We are the target.

#womensrights #patriarchy #yesallwomen