Avoiding the self-sabotage cycle

I almost did it, I almost did that self-sabotage thing again.

I totally stepped out of my comfort zone over something and it went really well. However, walking away from the “event” my brain started this self-sabotage and I began to listen and believe all the things it was telling me — I know it was trying to protect me but it was really and truly doing me a total disservice.

“don’t worry if X doesn’t happen, you don’t really want it anyway so don’t chase it”

Yeah brain, I totes am going with you on this one. Self preservation for the win. And yet …

There was this other voice, small but insistent, yearning and hopeful.

“but you’d like this to happen, take a chance, chase it”

That was the voice I wanted to listen to, but the other was so loud and sounded so sensible. So I listened, for a little while, even though it wasn’t what I truly wanted. I told people — yeah X happened and it was OK but I’m not fussed if nothing comes of it — because if I tell people then I have to believe it don’t I? But deep down I didn’t believe it, so I took my courage and held it in my heart and went chasing … not stalker level, just a small step towards what I wanted. I made myself a little vulnerable, took that chance.

And you know what dear readers, it paid off. And I am happy. I allowed myself to be open to an opportunity and it worked.

So what is your brain doing to self-sabotage your happiness? Are you going to listen or are you going to chase your smiles?