goodbyes

Saying goodbye to someone you have known and lived with for so long, is the worst thing ever. Torn between wanting them to enjoy and live as themselves and who they become, but wanting to also never let them go. Conflicting feelings on what one should even be feeling. A sister is not just someone, but is your forever best friend, whether they really want to or not. She left today, headed off to college, 11 hours away. Can I still talk to her? Yes, she is not dead, but she isn't here either. Having someone you love, close to you.. there are no words to explain it. Single children, they do not even understand the way this feels, and there would be no way to explain it to them. It’s not like when a parent goes on a trip, or a friend leaves for a few months, it is much, much worse. A sister is more than a friend, and more than a sister as well. That is why everything hurts more when they do it. They have a certain power over each other, that only they know about, and only they can emanate to each other. Nobody else has the power to make me cry, smile, sing, and laugh like my 2 sisters. I tried to deny she was leaving me, that in the end, that made it hurt even worse. Watching that car drive away… I could hear my own heart break.

Goodbyes are not forever, they simply mean, “I’ll miss you”, until we meet again.