Where Do I Live?
Where we live says something about us. When we ask this question it gives us insight into the person that is answering.
At a writer retreat I went to this year I was asked several times “Where I Lived?” I have lived in so many different places over the last couple of years I always hesitate before answering.
Why the hesitation?
I do not feel the town I am currently living in reflects who I am — which in many respects is silly. We chose to move here based on county affiliation and closeness to my work. I am in a temporary place and I know it. It is like we are stationed in this house and waiting for the next deployment and the emotions around this idea are complicated for me. So when I answered the question when asked by the wonderful people I was meeting, it sounded wrong when I said the name of the town where I rent a house where I sleep.
No one was judging one way or another but I felt like I needed to explain something that I could not quite place. I wondered if I sounded inauthentic when I spoke about it. I felt the need to share the town I worked in too even though it wasn’t asked as added information.
When one of my friends asked me how I was settling in a couple weeks after we moved to this house I answered, “I cannot walk around in the dark yet.” I still cannot most nights. It has been 11 months.
I positively frame the situation and am grateful for a house to live in. We have a great backyard where birds greet me every morning. Everyone has space here and my car is warm in the winter because we have a garage.
In this town, there is a delightful coffee shop and a used bookstore that I will frequent as time passes. There are new restaurants to try that are not chains.
I grew up in Northwest Indiana and left to live in Central Indiana after high school. I came back to the north after a close relative died. I knew if I didn’t leave the state after college graduation I would stay here. I plan to change that status soon.
I have been asked when I moved from New York to live in Indiana. I have been told I don’t quite fit where I am.
Where I am
Here is what I love about where I live — it is where I am. It is where my husband and four children are and that is what is important. (My books and writing are here too — also important!) The memories we have made in this area are important.
The physical space has come to not matter so much to me. I live inside my head a lot of time and circumstances have taught me to learn that many things I thought that were unshakeable are temporary. This is how life works and how I learn so I am not sad about it. I hope this post has not left you melancholy.
My inquiry to you is: