OUT OF CONTROL

It was the summer I met this really cute guy. I tried to play my cards right so I could see him. I met him in an awkward way. I was kinda chauffeuring my mom around the bars. I saw this attractive bartender. I was under age, so I didn’t actually want him to ask me to leave.

One night mom decided she wanted to go back to this bar. I noticed the bartender wasn’t working. Later on that night before the band announced last call for alcohol. That attractive bartender walked in. He walked over to the table I was sitting at (really felt like sitting under…to avoid listening to drunks argue) and he asked me to dance. Which really got my mom’s attention. He started to ask questions. He asked me for my phone number. I was kinda surprised that he wanted my phone number. Especially after he got my mother’s attention.

He actually called me. I thought he really wouldn’t want anything to do with me. After seeing my family at their brightest colors. We began to date. Like real dates…movies, putt-putt golf, eating pizza. What do you expect? I was totally under age for a bar. This guy was treating me like, I deserved better than a bar scene.

That is when chaos began. I was actually getting a life and was being taking away from my chauffeuring position for my mother. Which made life even harder to live with her. I thought she would be happy for me that I had found someone. She always reminded me I was never going to find anyone or was I ever going to amount to a damn.

That guy moved back to where his family lived. I knew it was too good to be true. Mom was right. I will never amount to a damn. As those thoughts was planted in my mind. I went on with life just as I did everyday. I wasn’t really looking for someone when I met “that guy.”

Then one chaotic weekend when mom and her boyfriend got thrown in jail. The car they were driving was totaled. My mom thought she could drive like Evel Knievel.(American stunt performer) Mom and her boyfriend had been drinking and fighting. It was one of those moments that I was thankful that there was no other vehicle or people involved.

I was trying to figure out a way to come up with money for bail. I get a phone call from “that guy” that I thought I would never hear from again. I realized who it was and I told him everything. I thought to myself I wasn’t looking for you, when I found you. He has already seen my family at their truest colors. So I have nothing to lose. There was a long silence, right after I exploded into the phone. He asks if I am still there. I made a noise through my tears. He asked if he could come see me. I think he may of seen my head shaking yes through the phone. Because I couldn’t speak very clearly of being so upset.

That guy is my husband today. I am very thankful God nudged him to call me and help me see a way when it seemed impossible to handle it on my own.

When things of life is getting out of control. When we can’t see a way through the storms of life. God is always making a way. Just be patient and keep the faith! God loves you no matter how broken you think you are.

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