All I can say is that in my experience, primarily it feels like, to put it bluntly, if someone can’t bone me at their convenience, then it’s not worth investing any energy into me.
The hierarchy polyamorous people don’t talk enough about
Lola Phoenix

I’m sorry that’s been your experience. I wonder if this is an increasingly common occurrence across other groups as well. I’m left feeling disappointed by people in general, at this point.

Edit: I saw you mentioned in a comment to someone else that you thought the same probably happened in monogamous communities. Yeah, I think it does. And I wanted to be clear that the disappointment I mentioned was disappointment in our apparent inability to think of intimacy as something distinguishable from sex.

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