Outside of the Bubble

I’m as guilty as anyone of having a bubble. I like being around people who think like me, like chicken soup — it’s easy. Since moving to my adopted city of Honolulu I’ve developed a bubble that’s nurtured me and inspired me. I love my bubble.

But comfort is rarely the genesis for growth.

Maybe because of social media. Maybe because I live on an island. Maybe because I’m naturally curious, but over the last few years in particular, I’ve yearned for opportunities to get me outside of my bubble. This year…I got a doozy.

I was offered the opportunity to work on a political campaign with a candidate whose own social perspective was diametrically opposite of mine. However, since many of the social issues I’m passionate about have already been firmly decided in my state, after meeting the candidate and having a heart to heart, I knew we did have some things in common and I could bring a fresh perspective outside of his bubble.

The candidate was nervous. Because I was outside his bubble.

And, I was scared.

I did some soul searching. I talked to trusted friends. I talked to family. I wondered if this choice would compromise friendships. I wondered if this choice would compromise business opportunities. I wondered if I would be proud of this choice. Maybe I wondered if it would compromise myself. And yes, I was afraid the job was too big for me.

I considered the risk this candidate was taking by hiring someone outside of his bubble.

Then I remembered what I told someone when they asked me if I was scared to move to Honolulu? “The reason TO do it is because it scares the hell out of me.”

That was the moment I decided to do it. I decided being afraid is the worst reason not to do something.

Political campaigns are like war.

There are external battles (the “opposition”). There are internal battles (“friendly fire”). There are ever-shifting alliances and conflicting information, perspectives and ideas. It is confusing. It is fast-paced. It is insane.

On top of that, I was eyed with suspicion by my own team. I was eyed with suspicion by my own bubble. At times, it felt utterly isolating. I was a complete outlier. It was deeply uncomfortable. Often.

It’s extremely hard to do a political campaign for your own personal growth. Most people who have done political campaigns would say that it’s impossible or not worth it. Most people would say there are much easier ways to have a personal growth experience. I would say that it’s what kept me going through 20-hour work days and endless emotional roller coasters.

Being an outlier made me introspective. It made me think of what it’s like for others to be an outlier, something anyone who does anything courageous has most definitely felt.

It also made me want to do the best work I could possibly do. I feel very proud of this work. Any risk worth taking is worth doing well. I didn’t always feel inspired, because I was living on a diet of soda…and popcorn, and the work was extremely challenging.

But it wasn’t the work that changed me.

Being an outlier changed me.

Discomfort changed me.

The people changed me.

For the first time in a very long time, I was exposed to the thought processes and ideas of people I would never have met otherwise. I went to battle with these people by my side. We laughed, we cried, we screamed, we rejoiced. Together. While we didn’t always agree, I learned that sometimes, agreeing isn’t the point, learning about other people and their perspectives is its own victory.

No one changed my personal beliefs, they remain firmly intact. I don’t think I changed anyone else’s personal beliefs either. It wasn’t about that. What DID happen, was a greater understanding of PEOPLE. A beautiful sense of mutual respect, something I never would have had otherwise.

It’s funny what happens when you put an actual person behind the ideals. Many of these people turned into friends. These people have given me a gift I could never have given myself: a renewed respect for people outside of my bubble. A reminder to treat everyone with respect and dignity, even if their principles and values don’t match mine. I learned lessons of kindness, humility and fairness. I learned to think critically about assumptions I long ago made.

When standing within your bubble, looking outside of your bubble, it’s easy to be judgmental, angry and even mean. But when you meet the PEOPLE outside your bubble, you learn something: they are just people too. People with dreams, hopes and fears and their own set of assumptions.

No real growth and progress is possible in this world without a mutual respect and a little risk taking. I’m damn proud of both.

As for my own bubble and their reaction, much is yet to be seen. I feel confident my bubble can respect me for this growth I’ve experienced, as I learned to respect others more. I feel confident my bubble can appreciate my need to grow. I feel confident that my bubble can continue to grow and accept that every once in awhile, I’m going to do something completely unexpected and utterly scary in order to pop my bubble.

Occasional bubble popping is unexpected, scary and yet very, very necessary, because that’s when new bubbles have a chance.

When bubbles rub together, you get more bubbles. And I’m planning on making lots and lots of bubbles.