Lessons from 2019, already.

Tarusha M
3 min readJan 24, 2019
Courtesy: Pexels.com Photograph by Nina Uhlíková

This happened randomly, I did not expect to be writing this post, so early into the year. But that is the thing with life, you receive a lot of lessons, at times, if you are paying attention and are self-aware- fairly quickly. Yes, the healthy dose of ego is present, complimenting myself, et al— one should learn to appreciate their own strengths because if we do not, then why would anybody else?
I am going off the topic, so I will dive, right in:

  1. It is okay to feel multiple things for one person or a set of people. It is not always black and white. You know you can dislike your family or friends at one moment but still have a love for them. It is okay to feel that. This might seem obvious for most, but this revelation was a little liberating for me. I do not need to be plagued by guilt, just because I am mad at someone, at some point.

2. Judgement is gross but it is subtle. We judge and get judged. Judgement brings out defensiveness and resentment. Judgement can bring out the worst in people. Try noticing your judgement, accept it and release it. It would help in not holding a grudge. We should also learn that at times, we feel judged when a loved one’s opinion differs from our own — but that is ok, one can live with differences. It is not something that ought to be taken to heart and personally.

3. It is okay to be called a bitch. Women are called the choicest of adjectives for standing up for what they want, being clear about it. Bitch. Women call each other that, men call women that- it is about nipping them in the bud. We are not perfect, but everyone seems to expect us to be the good girls, who are compliant and pliable. What I have learnt, over the years, again and again is — that it is ok to stand up for what you want, stand up for what you think is right. Brave. Intuitive. Amazing. Tenacious. Creative/Courageous. Healing. This is the new definition — remember this, everyone tags you as, one.

4. Not everyone has the same definition of success. I keep learning and re-learning this. It is okay for definitions to differ, it is your life and one should not have to conform to any kind of norms. You create your own success, there is not one mould. there are 7 billion people, hence 7 billion moulds for the definition of success.

5. Your family’s and friends’ problems should not overshadow your existence. Practise detachment. It will do you a tonne of good. One cannot change things, at times and detachment helps a lot.

6. Joy is always within you. It is within your reach. You just need to flip a switch — like Dumbledore said. One can choose to live in a bleak world that is overshadowed by all the demons, external and internal or one can choose to break out and choose happiness over everything else. There is a lot to be grateful for, always count them.

7. Making your own rules is a privilege and a blessing. One should tread lightly and practise extreme self-awareness.

8. Do not wait until the perfect moment to launch something, anything — launch it already. Do it. The lull will slow you down. Stop the thinking from a place of fear.

9. Learning a new skill can be frustrating but the outcome is wonderful. Persist. Age is only a number. Your perception is like a manual and architect for your life.

10. Your subconscious is a genie taking in every word you utter, creating every thought in your mind. Be kind to self, to see the kindness around yourself. Stop thinking thoughts that have been programmed into your head by the pop culture, your friends, family — question the beliefs. Create your own life.

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