Messages I Typed But Never Sent To You

I miss you so much. I heard a song that made me think of you. It was about not speaking anymore, even though both people want to talk. I hope it’s true, I hope you want to speak to me too.

I can’t sleep. I miss your arms around me. I know I could easily fall asleep in your arms, you’re my home. You make me feel safe.

The sky looks so peaceful, ya know? Like the world isn’t unfair for once. Like everything is the way it should be. But it’s not how it’s supposed to be… cause you’re not here.

My mind is racing. I can’t make these thoughts stop. You’ve been the only light in this darkness I call life. You’re gone and I can’t fucking take this anymore.

I hope you’re happy, honestly. I hope you’re not worried about anything, at least even for a second. I hope you’re getting sleep too, and good sleep, not just “sleep”.

I’m so sorry you’re going through a lot today. I know today’s tough for you; but I’m here for you. You don’t have to reply, but I wanted to tell you, I’m here.

I broke down walking home today. I couldn’t breathe and the world seemed like it was suffocating me. I wish you were there to hold me.

How are you? Like honestly? I know you’re lowkey terrified that college is just a week or so away, so you’re probably terrified as shit. I’m here for you.

I miss you so much. It’s late and you promised you wouldn’t leave. I need you so much.

I don’t know if you know, but the night you stayed, you left your necklace. I don’t know if it was a sign of you leaving me too, but it sure feels like it.

I found the shirt I wore when you were over. It was under my bed. It still smells like you. For a millisecond I thought you were actually here.

It’s not getting easier. The nights are getting longer and my heart is getting heavier. I wish you were here.