The roles of the NSA and GCHQ are purely about intelligence gathering.
We’re mad that they’ve overstepped their boundaries. But how can we be? Inevitably every swot is going to turn to the next page and try and do the harder questions to impress the teacher. What else can they do but gather more intelligence?

This is why I propose that they be renamed The Centres For Intelligence
Gathering and Paper Crane Folding. Now once they’ve tapped an appropriate number of phones and peeked in a few Gmail accounts and start drumming their fingers on the desk in boredom they can get on with the second part of their job: origami. This will prevent them from having the time to do anything nefarious.

It takes years to truly master it. Folded a thousand yet? Well I think there’s a junior agent going to miss out on his true love. In fact, I think it might be so appealing that it might take over from spying altogether. The next scandal is going to involve the release of secret documents that show a how to make a perfectly formed frog with just 6 creases.

If successful, I propose tacking on arbitrary crafts to the roles of all
bothersome government agencies. The army will become the Royal Group for Firing Guns and Papier Mâché Statuettes. The new House of Lords is the Robe, Basket Weaving and Natter Society. The Air Force will be simply be the Barrel Roll Committee.