Why Do You Write? He Asked
I know should learn to enjoy being alone.
I should get up and clean the kitchen
put on some music
pet the cat
make a meal
watch a movie
all of the things I’m in the right mood for when I want to show off ma mad keeppin’ it together skills to the one who cannot be bothered to pretend ease of mind.
Instead, when there’s nobody around to show off to
I sit and write and judge and bask in anger.
I come up with yet another
on politics or economy
on the moral troubles of our era
on the sadness of how we’ve been taught to organize socially
or on myself (still fundamentally misinformed).
All in hopes that the one who cannot be bothered to pretend ease of mind will read it and think we are the same.
All in vain.
Vain may be a good word to answer your question.
I write in Vain
because I’m Vain
my baby is so vain he’s almost a mirror
and the sound of his name sends a permanent shiver down my spine
Another possible explanation is addiction.
I started doing it to look cool
then I kept on doing it because it calmed my nerves
now if I don’t do it I don’t feel normal.