5 Ways to Leisure Properly

I once went to a birthday party where, after settling into a lovely venue, the incumbent best friend decided to rally everyone stumbling out the door, proceeding to the NEXT BAR.

Arguments about what was which way and who would get in led half the group ten blocks that way, and the other half home. This, before midnight.

It is the inexperienced revellers who spend the night strolling. Here are five ways to not ruin your evening

Don’t Schlepp — Do not schlepp unless absolutely necessary. You will spend more of your evening travelling than actually socializing. In fact, have a bloody good reason to leave the house. Everything outside is noisy, expensive and hard to get to.

Drink — Drinking makes everything funnier. It can redeem a slog of a day, and cement the bonds between those who aren’t typically sharers.

Don’t Drink — Otherwise known as ‘drive’. Drinking is bad for your health and will probably turn you into a bumbling idiot. Take the exit strategy and be more lucid than everyone else.

Be Darwinian — You are not obliged to catch up with everyone. People grow apart and grow back together again. Don’t believe the lie that if a group gathers, you must join. Make your own group. Doesn’t need to include Tom, Dick, Harry etc. Especially not Harry. Everyone hates Harry.

Repeat Business — If you know a decent venue or have one on trusted word, give them your business. What is good is not necessarily correlated with what is costly or prestigious. A venue that serves your favourite beer because it serves every beer may well be full with every drunk. If you can cook, you may cook better than whoever works in that restaurant, even if the decor is good or the waiter wears a tie. If you must leave your cosy nest, honour those who provide a good venue rather than some high priced pretense of ‘quality’.

Until the next bar.

This has been the thirty-first publication of Dressing Gown, a daily blog from Ted Janet.

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