Notes of an international student: Year III — Part 1
I’ve been thinking about how far I have come since the day I first landed in Canada for a while now. I had turned 18 exactly 2 months before arriving at Vancouver International airport. I didn’t know what to expect back then and I certainly did not think of myself as someone who was willing to try out new things in life.
I want to share my journey with you. I want to tell you about some of the things I’ve experienced, Lessons I’ve learned along the way, and offer some insight into how living in a foreign country away from everything I’ve known has made me a better person.
But, I don’t want to go the traditional route and start off from the beginning. I want you to know where I am in life right now and trace back to the first step I took at Vancouver airport to start life afresh as an international student.
June 2019
I have a full-time job right now, working at Tim Horton’s. I am in a bad head space right now and if I am being honest this has been going for quite a while. Graduating from college was the last last time I felt a sense of achievement, but that’s said and done. The more I think about it, the less valuable my accomplishment feels.
I have been relentlessly applying to every single job post I come across but I can’t seem to crack it, I am either rejected or ghosted, it sucks. I can’t be bothered anymore and I can’t take another rejection. Nothing seems to be going well right now.
Not to mention dealing with a former drug addict of a roommate whose crazy delusions manage to interfere with whatever sort of routine I have going on and disturb with my landlord at 2 am every night. It’s either that or arguing with a 30-something guy on petty issues such as an unclean fork or who is using the kitchen, which isn’t something I look forward to either. I feel angry, scared and stressed at the same time.
Work isn’t all that great either. I’ve been working 2 different shifts and double shifts now and then for a while. I can’t remember the last time I had a good sleep. My supervisor is very controlling I can’t take her screaming anymore. Dealing with irritated customers over a cup of coffee or a misplaced item isn’t worth it either. Every time I hear a customer complain I think about Russell Peters. “Take it, and go. Take it and go.’’ Just take it and go indeed.
It’s alright though, and honestly speaking I have to expect all of this, it’s a part of growing up. I shouldn’t be asking for help from my parents or anyone for that matter. This is the cost that is associated with the freedom I get in return. I have a full-time job and I pay my bills and I go to the gym.
The gym is the one place where I am happy. Where for 90 minutes no one bothers me. It’s a place where I feel zen. Lifting weights, stretching, listening to podcasts, and music . Maybe if it wasn’t for working out I would’ve gone insane a long time ago.
Getting to the gym used to be a pain though. I had to take public transportation and prepare well in advance if I wanted to get there early. I am lucky to have my landlord go to the gym with me. He’s a nice guy, and I enjoy his company. He’s a compassionate and a kind person. Shout out to you for helping me deal with my roommates and dropping off or picking me up from work every now and then. I am truly grateful for your help.
This phase truly does suck, I feel constrained. The only way I can see right now is to improve my skills and put out more projects online. Display my work to potential employers. Every now and then I start doubting my diploma and my grades which in turn makes me question my abilities. I start to focus on my negatives and I think to myself that I must be missing something otherwise I wouldn’t be in a position like this or maybe I am just not meant to be a software developer. But I have convinced myself that the only way out of this pain is through it.
July 2019
After creating a few more projects and a couple more interviews I am getting better at selling myself and talking about my projects and my skills with a potential employer. My first interview with LeadAssign was okay. I feel there’s a 60% chance of me getting a second interview. Can’t say for sure, Meanwhile it’s time to go serve some more coffee, gotta pay the bills right?
It’s been a little over 2 weeks now I haven’t gotten any response from LeadAssign but I do feel optimistic about the position. I know I have the required skills and I am completely qualified for the job. One caveat though, the office is about 2 hours away from where I live but that doesn’t bother me. In-fact I think I will be happier there. Living with my current flatmates is a nightmare.
I spoke to my landlord and it seems like he will ask my roommate to vacate. I couldn’t be more relieved right now. As much as I wish I could do something for him I am just not in a place myself to help him out. I think he needs to be in a better place mentally. He’s far worse off than me right now. I even paid for his emergency trip to the rehab center. I shouldn’t waste my time on him, it’s not worth it. I have other things I need to deal with.
It’s the 3rd week of July I’ve had my second interview with LeadAssign. It lasted for a total of 5 minutes and judging by our conversation I feel positive about my chance of landing a job here.
It’s the 31st of July today. I GOT THE JOB! Holy shit, I can finally stop working at Tim Horton’s and leave Brampton for good. As much as I would’ve preferred getting a job in Toronto I understand that this is way better than my current situation and I should be content it. I am very excited! My roommate has vacated but left all of his belongings here (weird). There’s a new guy moving in as well but what do I care? I am leaving in a month so it doesn’t really matter.
It’s the starting of august. I’ve told my employer that I would be moving in within the next 2 weeks.This is my last month here. After 2 ½ years of struggling, moving around, countless night-shifts my time here is done.
I can’t wait to call myself a software developer. It feels weird because I think it’s all I’ve wanted for a very long time. I get paid to write code. It’s time to find a new place. Live somewhere else for a while. I will be happier there and a change of pace would be nice.
October 2019
I am 2 months into my new job. I love it, I guess I am still in the honeymoon phase where everything still seems new and every interaction I have is a positive one. Maybe my coworkers are just that nice. I don’t know. The point is I still like my job and I hope it only gets better and better with time.
I still have a lot to learn from my co-workers. Being a junior member of the team I don’t think the same way about problems as they do. They’re ahead of me. I am playing a game of catch-up. That’s good though, because I get to learn from some very smart people who are highly skilled at what they do and I get to be a better version of myself. That’s the reason why I do the things I do.
Other than my full-time job I spend my days usually reading or working on a project or thinking about this blog, and working out. At the age I am right now I believe I have around 10 years or so before I stop having the time and patience where I can try things with a newfound passion. I don’t want that to happen but I see some people and they’ve lost that fire to improve themselves. Obviously, I don’t know the full story there but I am just scared about ending up in a similar position.
At the same time I see some people that are more than double my age and love what they do. I want to be like these people. I admire them and I want to learn from them. I want to be the person who people look up to 20 years from now. For that to happen I have to take action today that will catapult me into a future I envision for myself.
I don’t want to lose this mindset where I approach things with curiosity. My belief system right now is that I can improve myself in any aspect I want if I spend enough time at it and as long as I am content with it.
I don’t feel any kind of pressure internally anymore. I have the freedom to do the things I want to do when I want to do them. The cliché that life has its ups and downs is very true and I suppose this is my up. Which only motivates me to be well-prepared for the down. I still try to live frugally however. In my mind I still have the same mentality about finances when I was unemployed.
I do however take more financial risks. I’ve lost what I consider a good amount of money by investing in bitcoin, or by buying stuff just because instant gratification is a thing. My focus is now on building a financial nest egg big enough to support my expenses for 6 months. I think that’s a good target.
I am thinking of getting a part time job that will definitely help me keep busy during the weekends and I can some money on the side. Time is a luxury that I have right now. I have to make the right choices so that the future me is thankful for the decisions I make right now.
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