Being Interested In Others Makes You Interesting
I took the above title from a very famous book :How to Win Friends & Influence People. I settled on selecting this topic for the reason this sentence may seem just a wise use of phrase interested vs interesting. Conveying the message using combination of same word in an interesting art.Not only the selection of words,my mind was blown away with the profound thinking and the idea behind this.I would love to share the hidden message and highlights of the book. So, continue reading..
If truth be told, we all wish to win and influence people, eminently those with who we have deep affection. And why shouldn’t we? We must know the significance of expressing love to our loved ones.
Dale Carnegie was an American writer and lecturer and the developer of famous courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills. Born into poverty on a farm in Missouri, he was the author How to win Friends and Influence others, published in 1936, It is still a popular book in business and business communication skills. One of the core ideas in his books is that it is possible to change other people’s behavior by changing one’s behavior toward them.
So, what do you think being interested is important or being interesting? Before, i gone through this book i was in favor of being Interesting! I’ll explain the concept behind both words then, you’ll think again what’s important.
Being Interested means: you’re involved and passionate about someone.
Being Interesting means: you prefer to be fascinating and attractive.
To elaborate in a better way, I’ll ask you would you go for someone who is not involved in you? That someone wants to be attractive for you but doesn’t think you’re attractive enough!
The truth is we all want wish to be loved,forgetting we can only be loved by giving love,by showing interest.Yet I know and you know people who blunder through life trying to wigwag other people into becoming interested in them.
Now,I’m going to share my best takeaway from Dale’s principles:
Being Interesting is a by-product of being Interested in Others!
I was stunned for the reason that how did he discover to convey such significant message for everyone. I wonder, how beautifully he summarizes his sayings in a very effortless yet philosophical way. I gone through few lessons which caught me attraction:
First, rule of friendship: Be interested in your friends. Your friends need you, your attention, your passion and your involvement.
Did you ever stop to think that a dog is the only animal that doesn’t have to work for a living? A hen has to lay eggs, a cow has to give milk, and a canary has to sing. But a dog makes his living by giving you nothing but love.In his book, he shares the example of his dog, Tippy, whose death affected him a lot.
Alfred Adler, the famous Viennese psychologist, wrote a book entitled What Life Should Mean to You. In that book he says: “It is the individual who is not interested in his fellow men who has the greatest difficulties in life and provides the greatest injury to others.It is from among such individuals that all human failures spring.”
If we merely try to impress people and get people interested in us,we will never have many true, sincere friends. Friends, real friends,are not made that way. Sincere friends know about you, your problems, your weakness, your passion etc,this is all about their interest towards you.
he could feel whether or not the author liked people. “If the author doesn’t like people,“ he said, “people won’t like his or her stories.”This hard-boiled editor stopped twice in the course of his talk on fiction writing and apologized for preaching a sermon. “I am telling you,” he said, “the same things your preacher would tell you, but remember, you have to be interested in people if you want to be a successful writer of stories.”If that is true of writing fiction, you can be sure it is true of dealing with people face-to-face.
More lessons from the reading of How to win friends and Influence friends:
Rule#1: Become genuinely interested in other people.
Rule#3: Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
Rule #4: Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
Rule #5: Make the other person feel important — and do it sincerely.
On influence: The only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.
On the secret of success:If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own.
This was for the first time i implemented so quickly what I learned.You must try it too! You feel realize different feelings : In my case the it was, how can i be so ignorant? They were with me always and i never took interest in them, how could i ? If you’re doing the same thing please stop!
Most nearest to my heart, my family , I made tea-time with them and ‘they reacted’, “You seem change today, you never show this much seriousness about our routine and decisions”. I realized they don’t need to be call back ,they don’t need my reminder for I’m interested in you,that’s an obvious thing, why to show! But i was wrong ,loving them mean i must show my passion , my interest over and over again that’s true but love is something which increases by expressing.I was happy for their positive response.
I promise to be interesting by being interested in other.I’ll make this my custom.God willing!