Is my friend a narcissist? 9 Signs you’re dealing with a narcissistic person

Do you have a friend that seems to switch up their behavior with you? Do they act one way when you are together but when they are around a different group of friends they are a totally different person? Does it seem like you are a better friend to them than they are to you? Do you feel like you over-extend yourself with this friend? If you answered yes to any of those questions then chances are you are a dealing with a narcissistic individual and it may be time to cut ties with this person, run for the hills and never look back! It may sound a little crazy but these are not good people to surround yourself with. But only YOU can be the judge of that because you know them personally. Go through the list below and see if your friend has any of the qualities of a narcissist.

A Narcissist is an individual that has a grandiose sense of importance, they are selfish and lack empathy. They have an inflated need for attention and admiration with little to no regards for others.

Here are nine signs that your friend is a narcissist.

1.) They take but never give

Narcissists or Narcs are energy vampires. They are always taking from others draining their energy without giving anything back in return. A narc friend could ask you to do ten things for them and you willingly oblige. But they are reluctant to do just one thing for you when you ask. They will make excuses as to why they can’t do it or just flat out tell you “no”. If you feel that what you do for your friend is never reciprocated then you’re dealing with a narc.

2.) Disrespectful

This friend is verbally, emotionally and psychologically abusive. They use cutting words when addressing you, use remarks to put you down and try to invalidate your feelings. You might have first passed it off as the friend just being passive-aggressive or you may have given them the benefit of the doubt because you are friends but certain boundaries should not be crossed. A narcissist has no clear boundaries for anyone and will speak to you anyway they please and will not care how it affects you.

3.) Always asking for favors

This friend is always asking you to do something for them. Whenever they call or text you it’s not to check up on you but instead because they want something from you. To add, they never seem to say thank you for obliging their request. Instead they’ll say “You’re so sweet” “You’re so nice”. They are never grateful for the things you do for them because they think they rightfully deserve to have others serving them.

4.) They show little interest in you

Whenever you hang with this friend they pay little attention to you. While you give them your undivided attention when they are talking they don’t actively listen to you when it’s your turn to speak. They’re usually scrolling through their phone or distracting themselves with something else. You usually have to repeat what you say to them after every thought because they were never listening.

They have this attitude that everything is about them. They have to decide everything, control everything, each decision made is only to benefit them.

5.) Lack of Accountability

They can take advantage of you, use you, disrespect you, but when you finally speak up on their behavior they deny everything. They accuse you of lying, they gaslight you and completely disregard everything they’ve done to you. Even with actual proof of their behavior they still deny it. Narcs are the only villains that pretend to be the victim.

6.) They are Ungrateful

They never seem to appreciate all that you do for them. It doesn’t matter if you feed them, clothe them, lend them money, let them stay over your house or go out of your way to do them a favor they still will never be grateful for you and thank you. This goes into their sense of entitlement they feel they deserve to have things done for them, not earn them. Can you remember the last time they said “thank you” when you did something for them? If you can’t that’s a problem, they don’t appreciate you at all.

7.) They are Manipulative

They are only nice to you when it’s convenient for them, just to gain something from you. They like to stir up drama between people. They like to manipulate people’s thoughts, throw people under the bus in order to get others to view someone in a negative light. They will bring up past events to demean someone’s character. They will say or do whatever and stop at nothing to get what they want. They will go out of their way to hurt another person so that they can feel powerful. They gain power by putting others down.

8.) Brag about their other friends

Do you ever hang with this friend and they seem to always bring up their best friend? It doesn’t matter the conversation it somehow always routes back to their best friend. They talk about how awesome they are, how much fun they have with them, how much they love them and it’s like a giant middle finger to you. It might be to secretly make you jealous. It’s okay to talk about your friends every now and again to show how much you care about them, but when it becomes excessive and almost obsessive it seems very sketchy. Could this person be another victim of their narcissistic supply? Could this be another co-dependent relationship?

9.) Act different around other friends

Last but not least, a major indicator that your friend is a narcissist is when they act different around other friends versus when they are just with you. Narcissists have an image to uphold so around others they have to establish their dominance and they will do whatever they need to keep that, even at your expense. This friend could also be talking badly about you behind your back (because they are two-faced and not a true friend) so when you all are around the friend group that they gossip with about you, they tease you, belittle you and put you down to impress those friends.

If you made it this far in the article thanks for reading! I hope that this was helpful and shined a light on your friendship for you to clearly see the issues at hand. I hope you heal from those relationships, I hope you choose yourself and decide to walk away from friendships that do not respect, serve or appreciate you. You are too good of a person to deal with that abuse.

Originally published at http://authenticartsupply.wordpress.com on September 5, 2019.