The Bridgewater Bluff
TWIN CITIES, Minn. — When things couldn’t get any worse for the 2016 Vikings and their diligent fans, Vikings QB Teddy Bridgewater dislocates knee, tears ACL in drill, something unheard of and completely unexpected (and unofficial) may have been set in motion to change all of that. It is the one single possible glimmer of hope. That hope is called The Bridgewater Bluff.
Perhaps, sources specifically unrelated to the Minnesota Vikings organization have speculated and suggested that this last minute “phantom injury” suffered by the Vikings nascent quarterback is no less than the latest play in the Vikings playbook, the tactic itself untested, only theorized: The Bridgewater Bluff.
Hypothetically, what could be better than having an opposition team thinking that the Vikings won’t be using their one and only hope at the helm? Answer: Nothing. And that is why The Bridgewater Bluff is the latest and greatest play in modern American football, one that will set precedent for seasons to come.
Ancient proverb, and Rage Against The Machine, has us understanding the importance of knowing your enemy. For example, who is every other team’s enemy beside the Vikings, besides mascots? Answer: of course Teddy Bridgewater. If no one knows if TB is in, no one knows their enemy. Fact.
This genius maneuver to control the media by the higher-ups of the team has thrown a wrench in the gear of every defensive coordinator in the league, perhaps the world. Clearly, the Vikings are the only team this year expected to go undefeated and win the Superbowl as an adjunct for being generally reliably awesome. Now, with Bridgewater “on the sidelines… at least this entire season…” as pundits tout, we can expect that others can expect this and nothing as well. That unknown, being the absolute advantage, a new hope.
Obviously, the only way that the above assumed victories would be conceivably possible is by way of The Bridgewater Bluff. The Vikings have taken game making to a new level via psychological gameplay. With this kind of ploy the entire NFL will have to step up their game substantially to even get on, or close to the level of the Vikings, naturally.
The genius of this insane and hard-thought-out decision (especially with fans unawares) is that even the die-hard fans won’t have an inkling of when Teddy will come back to conquer all challengers on the field. Everyone knows a fake injury could plague a player for weeks, months, years(???)… And on that fateful day, when the stakes are at their highest, and the opposing team has prepared for anything but # 5’s smooth moves, Bridgewater will step up and put the Vikings above and beyond all others.
In conclusion, this is why The Bridgewater Bluff is the most innovative, thoughtful, and modernistic play the Vikings, and NFL, could ever have thought to put to use ever.