I think that maybe you should listen to it again. The hidden desire for pina coladas and requirement for half a brain was on her list of requirements and not his. That said, they are obviously both quite broken people with communication issues who deserve each other. Perhaps poems to each other can be their new venue although less public would be safer as one of them is bound to find the grass greener and sheets softer in another bed. Of course, even in that event the cycle will repeat if either of them fail to learn communication skills that led to this series of misfortunes to begin with.
The one thing I still don’t get is how she wants to make love in the dunes at midnight but, apparently she falls asleep early every night while he reads the paper in bed. Is she a night owl or not? Also, was this whole thing a setup since she knows he reads the paper in bed late at night?