The Secret-But-Not-So-Secret Diary of an Extrovert

Why it’s tough being an extrovert

I used to be an introverted kid. I hardly talked, daydreamed a lot, and enjoyed my own company.

Then I hit high school.

I wanted to talk to everyone, be the centre of attention, and could not sit still by myself. I still can’t sit still. I need to be doing something, be around people, talk all the time. Sometimes it feels like I’m talking just for the sake of talking.

The problem, though, started when I finished my university degree a week ago. Until last week, I was part of an institution with lots of people. I could make a new friend every day, whether in a class in high school, an after-school event, a university lecture or a club/society on campus. Everywhere I’ve gone, I’ve made new friends.

Until now.

I started a job part-time with the promise of full-time work. The idea was I’d start a few months after I finished university. There were 14 people in the office when I started, and I, being the social butterfly I try to be, instantly became friends with people in the office.

I should explain now that I use the term ‘friend’ loosely. I’m terrible at seeing the difference between an acquaintance and a friend, so I just lump everyone into the ‘friend’ pile. I have a few friends who jokingly say “At our university, we don’t believe in six degrees of separation. We believe in one: Charlotte”. I’m that terrible. I have to know everyone, and I have to be known by everyone. It’s this terrible complex I have where I used to be the unnoticed girl in the back of the room, secretly wishing she could stop moping and get her act together.

Anyway, now that I’ve become friends with everyone in the office and have finished university, I’m stuck wondering: what now?
I made sure I did as much as possible socially in university, and yet…

I’m stuck.

I feel like I have lost all of my extrovert-ness. I don’t know how to function properly. Where does an extrovert go to find more people to talk to about things they both find interesting? Do I just hope to bump into people in the street I can talk to? Do I become a member of a volunteer program (am in the process of doing that)? Do I do a short course in my spare time?

Perhaps I should become an alcoholic so I can go to meetings.
It’s that bad. I’m an extrovert with nowhere to vert.

Send help.