It’s not your job to fix their problems

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Photo: DutcherAerials/Getty Images

When a friend is going through a hard time, you likely won’t be able to make the situation better.

It can be hard to accept, but you’ll both be better off if you do. Because then you can turn to what’s within your power: You might be helpless to change your friend’s situation, but you can help them survive. You can honor and validate their loss, bear witness to their experiences and pain, let them know that they are cared about and valued, and remind them that they are not alone. …

Flirty giggles and all

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Image: Robert Couse-Baker

“I’ve been eating here at least three times a week for years,” Rachel Miller says as she slides into her desk chair and sets a plastic container holding a salad from the Cosí closest to her office down amidst stacks of books and colorful patterned file folders she recently impulse-­bought at Home Goods. “It’s my favorite spot.” Clad in Seven jeans she nabbed on sale at Nordstrom Rack three years ago, a white cable-­knit sweater, and thick­-rimmed black glasses covered in visible fingerprints, she digs into her salad, splashing droplets of balsamic vinaigrette all over her desk’s surface as she…

It has come to my attention that my ***former*** best friend Madison K. is making a huge deal out of how much she loves fall. I wasn’t going to say anything, but then after last night’s chapter meeting, I heard Madison tell Ashley P., Ashley B., and Lauren C. that she, Madison, loves fall “more than, like, anyone.”


Anyone who knows me knows that I have loved fall more than anyone since like forever.

First of all, between Labor Day and December 1st last year, Madison posted a mere…

Rachel Wilkerson Miller

I write about life, weddings, home, health, race, feminism, & vintagey things.

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