What Prevents Us from Living in the Present?

This moment, now, is our only reality. We have left yesterday behind and tomorrow has yet to come. Do you know what you’re doing in this precise instant?

It may sound like a silly question. You might answer, well I’m reading your article. Are you sure? Yes, indeed, you have your eyes on the screen. They are going through each line, through all the words. However, are you really reading or are you also aware of that person next to you in the subway? Are there any additional thoughts lingering around, maybe thinking about what you’ll do when you get home?

The present, as real as fleeting, a space in time we sometimes don’t realize exists. We prefer other moments, those that have already happened or those we wish would come true. Our time is spent between past and future. But, as the saying goes:

“Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That’s why it’s called present.”

How Can We Really Enjoy Our Present?

The best way to live in the now is by practicing mindfulness. It’s all about being focused in the activity we’re carrying through. If you’re working, work without getting distracted. If you’re talking to someone, put away your phone and carefully listen. If you’re doing the dishes, as a friend says, ‘why will I want a dishwasher if I enjoy all the process of scrubbing and cleaning?’ Maybe, as me, you don’t like cleaning, but it’s necessary. Therefore, even, while you’re cleaning, just clean. In the least amusing tasks we can reach a state of flow. And, we’ve already discussed how experiencing this state of optimal experience increases our levels of happiness.

How to Avoid Distractions?

1. Know Yourself

This is a fundamental step. You need to know what comes difficult to you, how you get distracted and with what. It’s also good to know, for example, in which time of the day you work best certain types of activities. As you may know, our productivity cycle varies through the day. We might start full of energy. However, as with every climax, it will eventually decline.

2. Set a Strategy

• If social media or certain websites distract you, there are apps (like Freedom) to block them during those hours you need to be truly focus.

Don’t try to rely on your willpower. The more you exercise this muscle, the more tired it’ll be by the time you might truly need it.

• If you start wandering around due to tiredness or lack of energy, I’ve experimented with a few options that might help you:

a. Identify your afternoon low point and take a nap. You can follow Daniel Pink’s recommendations (instructions in his book When: The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing, or in our post).

b. Review your diet. It’s possible you might be lacking nutrients to support your physical and mental activities. If you need any help with this, consult with a health care provider.

c. Work on your most creative and important tasks in that moment of the day where you energy and concentration are at the highest. In my case, this happens in the morning; nevertheless, as Daniel Pink mentions in his book, see above, we can be a lark, an owl, or something in between. This will determine your cycle of productivity. Therefore, it’s key for a better performance.

[Curious about which animal represents you? Take the test here.]

• If your distraction comes from within, meaning, thoughts, emotions, etc., practicing meditation can help you be more aware of what you think and feel while it happens. This awareness will allow you to redirect your attention to the task at hand. Dani Shapiro recommends the app Insight Timer. I’ve used Headspace. If you’re starting with the practice, having a narrator guiding your process can help keep it going.
• Are you among those who check the phone 2,617 times a day? Here, some tricks:

a. We have a rule at home. Once my husband arrives from work, we say goodbye to our phones. It’s now our ‘us time,’ as we call it. If it’s too tempting for your eyes, put your phone in a drawer (“What the eyes don’t see, the heart can’t feel” — Dia Reeves) or turn it off.

b. During lunch or when you take that coffee with your colleagues, use this strategy a reader shared with us: leave your phone charging at the office. We have so many apps that our battery doesn’t last much. Well, now you don’t have an excuse to be unavailable when your couple or friends truly need to reach you!

c. Are you in the subway without nothing to do and you can’t stand it? Always take a book with you. Don’t we always complain about not having enough time to read?

d. If you have an iPhone, you can use Freedom to block those distracting apps!

e. Try disconnecting from your phone one weekend a month, or whatever frequency works for you. Notify your friends and family that you won’t be available. Maybe, you’ll like so much the experience that it’ll get easier for you to disconnect from your phone during the week, too.

f. On vacations? Don’t purchase any long distance plan. Keep your phone just in case of emergencies. Why do you keep texting your colleagues if you’re out of office? Can’t wait until you get back home to upload the pictures from your trip?

• If you have tried it all and still can’t avoid distractions, paste a post-it in your computer screen or somewhere you’ll notice it so that you keep your priorities on sight. Do you know what has been working for me? I’ve been customizing my desktop image with quotes to help myself focus on what I need to. Every time I look at the screen, boom! Reminder…

What else distracts you? Do you have any other strategy to help you focus on what matters to you? Tell us in the comment section below.