Why Scrum Never Works

When the struggle to be Agile meets the realities of business

The Cynical Manager
6 min readMar 10, 2023
Photo by Quino Al on Unsplash

All Expenses Paid

When Scrum was concocted to justify a two-week “Agile Framework Conference” at a ski resort in the Swiss Alps, probably in a mad rush right before the end of the trip by some British guy who’s into rugby, I’m sure the intention behind it was good.

What they created is a way for IT executives to impose impossible goals on their unsuspecting workforce with as little investment as possible, so that even when this all fails, they can still say they run an agile company.

The Power of the Agile (Label)

Saying your company is Agile is much more important than actually being Agile. It makes you sound modern, and gives your customers a warm fuzzy feeling that you will accommodate all last-minute changes no matter how insane and impactful they are. You and your company will bend over backwards to implement whatever lamebrained idea Jim from Marketing came up with two weeks before launch because you’re Agile!

There are three main reasons why Scrum fails everywhere I’ve seen attempts to implement it.

  • The company adopting scrum doesn’t change the whole organization, it just starts with one department. The process…

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The Cynical Manager

The Cynical Manager lost all his hair in a freak 25-years-working-for-software-companies accident.