Why the Fuck Should I Watch FANTASTIC BEASTS: THE CRIMES OF GRINDELWALD?
Why the fuck should you watch “Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald”?
• You are a hard core Harry Potter fan and all you can think about while driving to your boring office is: “How did Nagini look like when she was young!?”
• You have a domesticated lion in the basement at home and call yourself an animal lover.
• Your favourite movie genre is: sequels to prequels.
• You like to stuff you mouth full of popcorn while watching top-level visual effects.
It was inevitable that the prequel to Harry Potter movies “Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them” (2016) gets a money grabbing sequel. Since the first movie was pretty funny and enjoyable, then I think everyone agreed, that we should get a worse one now — Like it has become a custom in moviemaking world in USA.
The visuals are great, CGI sexes your eyes and there are some cute magic animals to react with “aww” to. But the plot isn’t fluent, and at times leaves you thinking: “hmm…why”. You’ll get to see young Dumbledore who does nothing. You’ll see young Nagini who does nothing. And you’ll see the villain Grindelwald (Johnny Depp) who, after an unnecessary prison-break scene, walks around a lot and sometimes sits down also. You’ll get some Grindelwald action in the end too, but you know…it’s a long movie.
Johnny Depp did a better job with the character than I expected, but it was painful to wait after an pointless although somewhat thrilling opening scene, when the writers eventually give him something cool to do. It came at the end, but I felt it could have been so much more. But having said that, you can always lure your girlfriend to the cinema with saying, “There’s Johnny Depp in this movie” and then smooch with her in the back row between the first and the last action scene.
Why the fuck you shouldn’t watch “Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald”?
• You are pissed off that you never got your letter from Hogwarts when you were a little child.
• You are sure that this movie will be better than the first Fantastic Beasts.
• You are a religious person from Medieval age who has time travelled to 2018 and think witches should be burned.
• You hate unnecessary plot-points in movies and if you see more than one in the same movie you start breaking random shit.